The Struggle
by Williams
Summary: Harry and Draco are married when the final battle happens. Draco recieves bad news about Harry. He now had to struggle to raise their one year old daughter and help Harry. I have redone the first chapter, This is my first fic and all reviews with sugg
1. Bad News

Bad News

It was dark outside of the small home on the outskirts of London. A lone light could be seen flickering from the window. There was an eeriness that seemed to engulf the area as there were no stars shinning nor was the moon's glow. The sky looked as if it might suddenly spread apart and allow a torrent of water fall down.

A young man of twenty was sitting inside staring at the blazing fire that was currently burning in the fireplace. Even though the room was quite warm and toasty, the blond haired man was shivering from an invisible cold that had seeped in, chilling him to the bone. Tears could be seen streaming down his place face as he slowly rocked himself back and forth, just staring off into space.

Draco Malfoy still could not believe the news that he'd received a few hours ago. "How could this have happened? Harry was the most powerful man he knew and the most loving at that. Why did the fates do this to him? It just wasn't fair," He thought to himself.

He began to let his mind wander back to when Professor Snape had come through the fireplace to give him the news. He could remember the man's face looked paler then usual and he had a look of complete sorrow clearly showing on his face.

Flashback

Draco had just put Emily down for her nap and was about to go back down stairs. He was anxious to hear if his husband had defeated Voldemort yet. He was quite worried about this, especially since he knew of the prophecy about Harry and the Dark Lord.

He'd just reached the living room and was about to sit down and read his book when he heard the usual roar from the fire. Looking over towards it, he saw the green flames rise up and his Godfather carefully step out. He was about to ask him what was happening, but taking one look at the dark haired man he knew that it wasn't good.

"Severus, what has happened? Is Voldemort dead, where is Harry," Draco cried out sensing something was wrong.

"Draco, please sit down I have some bad news for you," Severus replied in almost a whisper. Draco just nodded and sat down in his favorite chair.

"I don't know where to begin. I will say this he is no more. Potter was able to defeat him, however something tragic has happened—"

"What is it? Where's Harry," Draco cried know beginning to feel desperate.

"Harry has been severely injured—"

"Where is he? I need to get to him," Draco shouted as he jumped up and headed for the fireplace. Severus grabbed him by the shoulders and spun him around so that he could look into his eyes.

Once he saw Draco's eyes he for the first time in his life didn't know what to say. He could see pain and fear in the young man's eyes. There were unshed tears now beginning to fill up his eyes. Instead of trying to talk to him at the moment, he grabbed the man and guided him over to a chair.

"Listen to me Draco; you need understand what has happened. Harry is currently at St. Mungo's being treated. We are unsure of the extent of his injuries. After he defeated the Dark Lord, he just fell forward and collapsed on the grounds. Once we got to him, he was unconscious. When I left to come here he had yet to wake up," Severus stated.

"I need to get to him, Sev. I need to see if he is all right. I can't lose him, not now," Draco replied in a strained voice.

"I am aware of that, but right now you have to get yourself together. Emily needs you more then ever and Harry will to when he gets better. I need to go, but I will let you know what is going on as soon as I hear anything." At this Draco could only nod,

End of flashback

Draco didn't know how long he had been sitting staring off into space or how long Emily had been crying before he came out of his stupor. Getting up he quickly headed upstairs to check on her.

Reaching the nursery he stopped for a moment and thought back to the day Emily had been born and what it meant for his life. It had been one of the few days in his life where he actually felt as if he was going to have the life that he always wanted. It would be a life where he would feel and know love that was genuine, not one that was full of hate and expected to kill people because they were different then him. With a huge sigh he crossed the room and reached down to pick up the crying child.

Flashback

"_Well Mr. Malfoy I am pleased to tell you that you have a very healthy daughter," Madam Pomfrey said as she handed Draco his baby._

_Draco accepted his daughter with shaking hands. He could feel his heart racing from sheer nervousness from the realization that he had just given birth to a beautiful little girl. He could feel Harry brushing his hair back and saying that she was just as beautiful as he was. _

_For the first time in his life he now knew what true happiness was. Tears were beginning to fall down his face as he looked at little Emily all wrapped up in her pink blanket. He was surprised to see that she had slightly darker hair then his platinum but not as dark as Harry's raven color. Her eyes to his amazement looked just like Harry's except that at the moment didn't have that same twinkle._

"_She is just as beautiful as you are Draco," Harry said with a voice full of emotion. All Draco could do was nod in agreement as he couldn't find his voice._

_Madam Pomfrey came over and took little Emily from him saying that he needed to get some rest. Again all Draco could do was nod; after all he did feel extremely tired. _

"_Harry my love, please stay with me," Draco pleaded as he looked up into his husband's eyes. Harry just nodded before he climbed onto the bed and took a hold of him._

_That was how the two spent that night. When he awoke several hours he looked over groggily and saw Harry laying there holding him. Draco just smiled and snuggled down further into the embrace. This was what he longed for all his life and now it had come true._

_End of Flashback_

He carried Emily downstairs and into the kitchen where he warmed her bottle. He was still upset about what was happening. This feeling of hopelessness was something that he disliked immensely. To him he knew that he shouldn't feel this way, "a Malfoy does not feel hopeless," he thought to himself as he sat down at the table to feed Emily.

"Malfoy's are proud and never show their emotion. Emotion is a weakness Draco," he could hear his father saying to him.

"No father you are wrong, emotion is not a weakness and I am strong. Just as strong as any Malfoy," Draco spat out loud.

With a sudden strength he decided that no matter what happened to his love he would stay strong. He had to for Emily's sake. Looking down at his daughter he couldn't help but smile at her beauty and innocence. Whatever happens he will teach her the right way to live and that she is the child of the wizarding world's hero. There is no way that anyone would hurt his child.

Several hours later Draco found himself sitting in the Headmaster's office holding a sleeping Emily. He had been surprised at hour old Dumbledore looked at the moment. He couldn't see the blasted twinkle that the man always had in his blue eyes. Instead all he could see was sadness and sorrow. He knew that this was from what had transpired at the final battle and probably because of Harry.

He wanted to know what had happened and how his husband was doing, but at the same time he felt fear, a fear that chilled him to his very soul. He looked up from Emily and stared at the man that was currently sitting across from him.

"Mr. Malfoy, I have asked you here to explain what has happened to Mr. Potter. I am aware that Professor Snape has all ready spoken to you about the fact that he was seriously injured." Draco just nodded in understanding.

"I am afraid to say that Harry was injured beyond help." At this Draco jumped in shock and fear. He tried to speak, but his voice was gone.

"Please sit down and let me explain. When he took on Tom the battle was quite fierce. I have never seen so much magical energy being used since the days of Grindelwald. Harry was hit with a cutting hex that destroyed his right leg. The healers at St. Mungos were able to repair most of the damage to his leg, however by the time they were able to do this the muscles were beyond complete repair. Therefore I am afraid to say that he will never be able to walk properly again. He will have to use a cane and will never be able to fly again. There was just too much damage to be repaired."

"Is that all sir. When can I see him," Draco asked with tears in his eyes.

"No I am saddened to say that is was not the only damage that was done. Somehow there was a backlash from the spell that he used to defeat Tom. This spell was a very ancient one and no one knew what the repercussions could be to the caster. Mr. Potter woke up two hours ago with no memory."

"What do you mean no memory?"

"He does not know who he is or what happened to him. The healers are still running tests to see if there is anyway that he can gain his memory back."

"Sir I need to see him as soon as I can.

"I will take you to him, but please be aware that he probably will not know who you are. Also, his face has been burned badly and he is still heavily bandaged." At this Draco could only nod.

He didn't care if Harry knew him at the moment; all he wanted was to know that he was still alive. He'll deal with everything else later, but right now this was all he could think of.


	2. The Visit

_A/N I just want to say thank you to those who have reviewed my story so far. Please keep reviewing and any suggestions are welcomed. Also, this chapter was a little hard to write and I hope you like it. _

The Visit

Draco found himself a few hours later after his meeting with Dumbledore walking through St. Mungos towards the lift that would take him up to where Harry currently was residing. He was a little anxious as to his visit since he wasn't sure how he would react to what he saw. Once he reached the lift he made a quick decision that no matter what he was not going to show any emotions, especially sadness and he definitely was not going to cry. No that was definitely at of the question, after all he was still a Malfoy and Malfoy's don't show their feelings.

A few minutes later he found himself standing outside of Harry's room. His heart was now pounding so hard that he was beginning to think it might explode. He knew that is was from fear that this was happening a fear of the unknown like how would Harry react to seeing him or how he was going to react to the sight of his beloved. Taking a deep breath and slowly letting it out as he tried to calm his nerves he reached for the knob and opened it. Walking into the room with a purposeful stride, he stopped in mid stride and stared with wide eyes.

Tears began to well up in his eyes as he felt his heart begin to break at the sight that was in front of him. Harry was lying there on the small hospital bed covered in a dark green blanket that came up to the middle of his chest. The one side of his face was completely bandaged including his eye where Draco knew had been burned from the incendio spell. Another thing that he noticed was Harry's right leg seemed to be much smaller then the last time he had seen it, but he wasn't to sure since it was covered with the blanket. He wondered if he was awake and knew that someone had come into the room. He wanted to walk over there and give him a huge hug, but somehow he found that he couldn't move. It was like he'd been frozen to the spot.

It took him several minutes before he finally swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat. He carefully made his way over to the bed as a strange feeling began to flow through him. It was a feeling of sheer helplessness as he slowly sat down in the chair and watched his husband lying there completely unaware that he was there.

Harry stirred slightly and opened his left eye. He sensed that someone was sitting next to him. Unsure of who they were he cautiously turned his head and was surprised to see a blond haired man sitting there staring at him.

"Um who are you and why are you in my room," Harry asked warily.

"I am Draco Malfoy and have come to see how you are doing," he replied unsure of what he should say.

"Okay but do I know you?"

"Well yes we do know each other," Draco said now sounding uncomfortable and looking down at the floor.

"How do you know me? I don't know you," Harry asked now looking a little scared.

"Um well we've been friends since our sixth year in school and well," he stammered not knowing how much he should say. After all he didn't want Harry getting mad at him.

"So we knew each other in school are we best friends,' he asked.

Oh God Draco thought to himself how was he supposed to explain his relationship with Harry. It was just as Dumbledore said, he didn't remember anything. Finally he got the courage to tell him figuring that it was the only thing he could do. "Well Harry we are more then best friends. We've been married for two years now," he stated not daring to look at Harry.

"What do you mean, we are married. I don't know you. There is no way that we could be married," Harry stated firmly shaking his head.

At this comment Draco felt his heart finally break in two. He had held onto some hope that Dumbledore had been wrong and that Harry would remember him when he saw him. However that is definitely not the case. He felt tears begin to fill his eyes once again and quickly fought to hide them. There was no way he would allow Harry to see them.

"I'm sorry but it is true. Hasn't anyone told you this?" Harry slowly nodded but didn't say anything.

"I can tell you about how we got together if you'd like." Again Harry just nodded.

Draco leaned back into the chair trying to figure out how he was going to explain everything to his husband. He wasn't sure how he would take it all, especially about how nasty he'd been toward him in the beginning. He just hoped that maybe something he will say will trigger a piece of his memory.

Draco had spent nearly two hours talking to Harry about their life together and some of the things that they had done in school. It had been hard on him because Harry never really showed any emotion. He had just sat there and listened to what Draco was telling him, but nothing seem to trigger his memory. Draco had left feeling more helpless then when he got there.

Now he was back at Hogwarts in his Godfather's rooms. He was sitting on the couch staring off into the fire. Emily was curled up on the couch next to him sleeping. He felt emotionally and physically drained from his trip. He knew what to expect when he went there, but he just wasn't ready to see it for himself. Something inside made him feel cold and he began to shake. He heard the painting open up, but never looked up to see Severus stroll into the room.

Severus stood there staring at Draco a scowl on his face. He wasn't sure who he should be angrier at the moment seeing how distraught Draco was. He glanced over at the sleeping form of Emily and could feel his anger grow inside. With his normal fluid motion he walked over and placed a hand on his Godson's shoulder and was a little taken aback at how much he was currently shaking.

"Damn you Potter couldn't you have done one thing right in your pathetic life," Snape swore under his breath. "Draco I think you need to get some rest. Take Emily to the spare room, you can spend the night. You look like you could use some," he stated firmly brooking no argument.

Draco just looked up at him with tears flowing down his face and nodded. Not saying anything he picked up Emily and walked to the spare room.


	3. Conversations

_A/N this chapter will be the start of the actual struggle like the title says. I think this is probably the best chapter I've wrote so far._

_Chaeli- Harry will see Emily but not for a little while longer._

_HPFan Emily will be playing a big part in this story but it won't happen for quite some time._

Conversations

For the next several weeks Draco had not gone to visit Harry. After the first visit he had taken Emily and gone back to their home. He started to withdraw from the rest of the world even going as far as to let the house elves go, telling them to go to Hogwarts and work. Even his usual temperament had changes and instead of being happy or even his usually mean self had become angry and depressed. Several times he would just blow up and start throwing things around the house.

His normally clean and exceptionally neat clothes were now dirty and disheveled. His hair looked like it hadn't been washed or even brushed in ages. Overall, he looked like someone who should be living on the streets instead of having money and a nice home.

The only thing that Draco at this point even cared about was Emily. He was more tentative to her and would always be holding her and gently rocking her. It was like she had become his rock, a rock that allowed him to keep one foot in sanity. Emily never noticed that there was anything wrong with her father, instead she just laughed and giggled. She even started forgetting to play with her toys and would always run to Draco to be picked up and played with.

One particular day Hermione was sitting in Dumbledore's office sipping tea. She had just come back from a visit with Harry. It had been a strange visit as he seemed to have become quieter then before. She tried to get him to open up and talk little, even going as far as to tell him more stories about him. But no matter what she did or say Harry was more distant then he had been. Now she sat there with the Headmaster discussing the situation.

"Albus, Harry seems to be withdrawing into himself. I tried to get him to talk about whatever was bothering, but he just sat there staring off into space. I even tried talking to him about our first years at school and he didn't even acknowledge me or ask any questions. I don't know what else to do to help him. I feel so useless when it comes to him," she said sounding sad.

"I know how you feel Miss Granger. I have been trying to find anything that will help him with his memory, but so far I am at a loss," Dumbledore replied sounding older then he was.

"Sir, has Draco gone to see Harry lately?"

"I am afraid to say that Mr. Malfoy has not visited him since a few days after the battle. He seems to have closed himself off to everyone."

"What do you mean, hasn't he talked to Severus," She asked sounding shocked. Dumbledore just shook his sadly.

They both fell into a quiet silence and contemplated what was happening. They both had been overjoyed at the defeat of the most evil wizard since Grindlewald, but then everything had become more complicated since that day. They had mixed emotions when it came to what happened to Harry. Neither one wanted to believe that Harry was injured beyond care and that his Memory seemed to have vanished just like the Dark Lord's soul. Dumbledore himself had taken it extremely hard since he always considered Harry like a Grandson and felt as if his whole childhood was a huge mistake. A mistake that he wished he could have changed many times over the last several years. Hermione on the other hand had taken it even worse then he had. She threw herself into books trying to find something that would help him. She had even postponed her wedding to Ron saying that she wanted to wait until Harry could be there. At the time Ron fought with her about it saying that Harry would have wanted them to get married. But he finally relented when she pointed out that Harry was supposed to have been his best man.

"There has to be something that we can do. I just can't sit back and see him like this", she cried trying to hold back her tears that threatened to fall.

"I understand how you feel but I am afraid that we may just have to wait and see if his memory comes back on its own."

"What about Draco? Is it possible that he could help Harry?"

"Yes it is possible, but I am afraid that we won't be able to count on his help. I am unsure if he is all right," he stated sadly.

"Wait you mean no one knows if he is all right. What about Emily?"

"We do not know. No one has been able to get inside. He has cut off the fireplace from the floo system, blocked any apparating into the house and he won't answer the door."

"This is ridiculous. He is being a prat and I for one am not going to let him or Emily suffer alone," she stated and stood up to leave.

"Miss Granger, what do you propose to do about the situation with young Mr. Malfoy," he asked looking at her intently.

"I am going to go over there and give him a piece of my mind," she stated calmly. And with that she strolled determinedly towards the apparating location. Dumbledore just chuckled slightly and hoped that Miss Granger could help him.

A few minutes later Hermione appeared with a pop in a small alley near where Draco and Harry lived. Making sure that no one was looking down the alley she made her out and towards the house. She was determined to give Draco a piece of her mind. He couldn't let himself fall apart and shut himself away just because Harry had been injured. Also he needed to get a grip on himself for Emily's sake and this was what she was going to tell him.

Reaching the front door she stopped and rummaged inside her pants to find the key that they guys had given her several months ago. At the time she thought they were both crazy for giving to her. They had told that they wanted her to have it so that she would be able to check on the house when they went on their vacation in July for Harry's birthday. She still had tried to refuse it, but now was glad that she had finally caved in and accepted it. Putting the key into the lock, she opened it and stepped inside. She was surprised at how dark it was and began to feel uneasy as to what she would find.

Walking into the small living room she stopped dead in her tracks as her mouth fell open in shock. The house looked like a mess as if a tornado had touched down. There were several dirty dishes lying around and some that were in pieces on the floor. A lot of Emily's toys were strewn all over and even one of the child's blankets sat over the back of the couch. She could smell several foul odors in the air, quickly realizing that there were probably dirty nappies and rotten food in the room that Draco had just left where they were. She began to get a little worried at not seeing Draco or even a house elf.

"Draco Malfoy -Potter get your arse down here this minute," she shouted sounding like Molly Weasley when she was mad at one of her kids.

A few minutes later Draco came down the stairs carrying Emily. Emily was cooing slightly as she sucked on a bottle. He looked like a heard of hippogriffs had stampeded over him. His hair was dirty and matted. His usual pristine robes were dirty in appearance with several stains that were clearly made by Emily. She noticed that his eyes looked dead and cold as he stopped at the foot of the stairs.

Seeing him like this her anger evaporated leaving only shock and sadness in its wake. She clamped her mouth shut and tried not to stare at him. Her mind was now completely confused as to what was happening here. She wasn't sure what she should say to him or what to even do at this point. This was the first time since she knew Draco, which she actually began to feel sorry for the once arrogant, spoiled, selfish git that he used to be.

"What do you want Granger," Draco asked in a cold tone.

"Draco what is going on? I've never seen you like this."

"I don't believe this concerns you in any way."

"Oh yes it does Malfoy. It is no longer just about you, there are Emily and even Harry to think about."

"Don't you bring him into this," he hissed.

"Draco he needs you and so does Emily. You can't just let yourself fall apart like this. We're not in school anymore. I thought you loved him."

"I do love him and I am taking care of Emily. Now I think you should leave," he said and started to go back upstairs.

"No you don't Draco, you are going to stand there and listen or I'm going to hex you," she said sounding dangerous. "Just because Harry is in a horrible condition doesn't mean you can just walk away. He needs you more then he ever has. He also needs Emily just as much. You maybe the only person who can truly help him get through this rough time.

"I cannot help him Granger. I have lost the only person who saw the real me," he said now sounding depressed and lonely.

"How can you say that? Harry loved you with all his heart and he still does. You have to try and help him just like he helped you."

"Look don't you think I want to help him. Don't you think I want him back? I would do anything to have the real Harry back. You know that there isn't anything I can do. I just want this nightmare to end," he said his voice breaking with emotion.

"You can help him. You can go and see him, talk about your life together, tell him about Emily. There are lots of ways that you can help him and just maybe you will be able to help him get some of his memory back. Now why don't I take Emily to my house for awhile? You can get yourself straightened out go see Harry," she said. Draco thought about it for a minute before nodding in agreement.

Fifteen minutes later Hermione and Emily had left. Draco found that the house was even colder and darker then it had been. He sat in his favorite velvet green chair and stared at the mantle of the fireplace. His eyes were looking directly at a picture of him and Harry that had been taken on their graduation day from Hogwarts. He stood up and walked over there, picking up the picture and staring at it. He was remembering how wonderful that day had been for the two of them. It had been a day full of surprises and excitement. A small smile played on his lips as he remembered that it had been the day when they decided to get married and move into a home of their own.

"Bloody hell, how am I supposed to help him? Why did I have to fall in love with Harry Potter," he screamed as he threw the picture across the room and broke down crying.

A/N There has been a lot of hits to this story but not a lot of reviews. Please send me a review, I don't care if you like it or not. I would like all feedback that will help me with the rest of the story.


	4. A Nightmare or A Memory

It had been a long day she admitted to herself as she walked into the living room. She had just got Emily down for a nap and now was quite tired. She flopped down in one of the chairs and closed her eyes.

She no longer felt like she knew the answers to everything. The situation with Harry and Draco gave her a feeling of uselessness, something that she had never felt before.

On top of this she had to deal with Ron when he got home from work. She wasn't particularly looking forward to telling him about what happened. He was still unsure of Draco and believed that he was only using Harry. He'd been tolerating him only for Harry's shake. But now that Harry was in the hospital he would always act as if Draco was still like he had been in school.

At times he would make comments that Draco didn't give a damn about Harry. That the only reason he was with him was to keep he Malfoy name in the public eye. She had tried to argue this but Ron would only get angrier and not even try to see reason.

A few minutes later she heard a small pop from the kitchen and knew that Ron had arrived home. Pushing herself up from the chair she gave a sigh and headed for the kitchen. She tried to brace herself for the conversation that she was about to have.

She walked up behind Ron who was bending down into the refrigerator looking for a butter beer. She wrapped her arms around his waist and felt him straighten up immediately and turn around. He leaned down and gave her a quick kiss on the lips and noticed that her eyes were slightly red and she obviously tired.

"What's wrong Mione has something happened?" She just hugged him again burying her face into his chest. "Mione you're starting to scare me. Has something happened to Harry " he asked his voice showing concern.

"No it's not Harry. There has been little change with him. He started his rehab today. He's not the one that I am worried about."

"Then who is my love," he asked rubbing her back gently.

"It's... It's Draco," she replied barely above a whisper.

"What has that git done now?"

"It's not what he's done Ron. It's more of what's happening to him. He seems to be withdrawing from the world."

"Good maybe he'll leave and never come back."

"Ron you don't mean that ' she asked sounding shocked.

"Yes I do. Harry should have never gotten involved with him. Draco is just using him and you know it. I mean come on his father died as a Death eater and he's just using Harry's name to keep himself in the limelight," just as he said that he felt a sudden stinging across his face where Hermione slapped him. "What did you do that for," he asked rubbing the side of his face.

"Ron you are an idiot. I can't believe you are still that thick. You know damn well that Draco has changed and loves Harry." She stated and took a deep breath. "Ron you should have seen him today he looks like death. He didn't say hardly anything when I was there yelling at him. Ron I'm afraid he may hurt himself now that Harry's the way he is." She buried her face in his chest once again and started to cry. Ron just held her rubbing small circles on her back.

That night Harry was sleeping fitfully. He found himself standing on a grassy hill. He could see a dark forest in front of him. The sky had gone from its usual sunny summer day to a dark and dreary one. He could hear people shouting all around him.

He had glanced around briefly and saw various colors zooming through the air. He turned back to find himself facing a man in a black robe with his hood up. He tried to see the man's face but all he was able to see were two glowing red eyes glaring at him. The man seemed to be almost hovering over the ground as he drew closer.

Instinctively he pulled his wand out and shot a stunner at the advancing man. The stranger dodged out of the way and set his a disarming spell at him. Luckily he was able to fall and roll away from it. He heard the man give out a hiss before starting toward him.

He was about rise to his feet when he heard someone mutter a spell. Fearing that it might be a nasty curse he tried summing a shield. However he was just a second to late when the spell hit him on the right side of his face.

Falling to the ground screaming in agony he buried his face he heard the man laughing maniacally. His screams grew louder as the pain increased in his body. Suddenly he sat up in his bed screaming and clawing at his face.

_A/N This chapter didn't come out quite the way I wanted. I rewrote it three times but just couldn't find the right way to end it. Now starting with the next chapter I am going to speed this story up some. _

_Let me know how you like this one. I may go back later and rewrite this one again. Also check out my new story Affairs of the Heart._


	5. Surprising Words

_A/N Here is another chapter. This one is filled with angst. I hope you all like it. Please R&R_

It was now six weeks since Harry started his rehabilitation with one of the healers. Her name was Katie Langdon. She had a slender build with long flowing red hair. Her hazel eyes seemed to always sparkle with mirth.

Katie was one of a handful of healers that were trained in both magical and muggle healing techniques. She had ended specializing in neurological conditions.

Harry had been surprised that she looked only a few years older then him. At first he though it was funny that this young girl would be the one to help him learn to walk again, but he soon found that wasn't true. He soon realized that her age was deceiving and pushed him hard.

Today he found himself sitting on a low table working on lifting his leg up and down. When he first started doing this exercise he found that he couldn't move it even an inch. But now he was able to lift it about two inches up. He could hear Katie urging him on each time but it was so hard.

She also made him stand up holding onto two bars. While doing this he would have to try and squat down using only his knees. This was much harder then the other exercises. He inevitably would fall over since he still could not feel his leg. More then once when this happened he would get so frustrated that he would yell out no more. But Katie would just help him up and try again.

After an hour of this he found himself sitting back in his bed feeling exhausted. He just sat there feeling lonely and unsure of himself. He hated doing the exercises but at the same time he felt as if it were just a waste of time. Then there was the problem of his memory.

He found himself nearly every night waking up screaming from some nightmare. At first he refused to explain to the healers about them. Finally after the second week of these nightmares and them pressuring him did he decide to tell them about what the nightmares were?

At first the healers had told him that they were just nightmares and would give him a dreamless sleep potion. But eventually they started looking at them a little more in depth. Katie had told him last week that they could be possible snippets of memories that were surfacing.

He hadn't taken the news very well when she told him. If these were memories they were surely not ones that he wanted to remember. And with this thought he found himself getting even more exhausted as he fought to constantly stay awake.

During these six weeks Draco had yet to accept what was happening. He did however spend time with Emily, but chose not to keep her. He didn't feel as if he could properly take care of her. Besides he reckoned it was better for Emily at the moment.

He found himself wondering through the house remembering fondly the days that he and Harry spent together. He would even talk to Harry as if he were no longer living. His mind seemed to have lost all understanding of life and death.

"I wish you were still here Harry. I can't do this alone. Oh Harry you were the one that helped me to see the light about Voldemort and helped me to redemption. You gave me warmth and love like I had craved all my life. I just don't know what to do anymore," Draco said his voice breaking with emotion as he stood there looking at pictures of Harry from their graduation day.

"I need you so much love. Emily needs you too." Just as he spoke these words a knock came at the door.

It took him a few minutes to come out of his reverie before going over to the door. He barely acknowledged Dumbledore before allowing him to enter.

The two men sat in the living quietly staring at one another. Dumbledore could see so much pain in the young man and his heart went to him. He knew what it was like to have lost a love one in such a cruel manner. But unlike Draco his wife actually died in the battle with Grindlewald.

"Draco I need you to listen to me carefully. I am aware that you are feeling lost and unsure of what to do now that Harry isn't here." Draco just nodded in agreement at this.

"Harry is still with us even though he has been badly injured from the battle with the Dark Lord."

"That's just it isn't he is here but he isn't," Draco said sarcastically.

"Draco he needs you and Emily. Just as much as you both need him. I am unsure if you are aware that at the moment he seems to be gaining some memories back." At this Draco suddenly sat up and looked at the old man. "The healers have told me that he has been having nightmares. These nightmares are of the final battle and the death of Sirius Black."

"You mean he is actually starting to remember things," he asked sounding puzzled and excited at the same time.

"Yes he is, but these are not good memories. I'm afraid that they are beginning to take a toll on him. You see these are terrible memories. Memories that only pain and heartache."

"But what can I do, I can't even handle what has happened to him. How am I supposed to help through this," Draco replied knowing what Dumbledore was getting at.

"You need to remember that no matter what happens Harry is still here. He needs someone that he can talk with about them and help him to understand what they are. At the moment he refuses to discuss them. Draco for your own sanity and for Emily's sake you need to understand that you can be useful." Draco just sat there dumbstruck at what Dumbledore told him.


	6. A Memory Returns

_A/N I just want thank everyone who is reviewing this story. I really like where it is going and hope you all do too._

It was now the beginning of September and Draco had yet to go and visit Harry. At times he felt like running to his side knowing he needed him in some way. But there was this part of him that rationalized his refusing to go by saying _you can't do anything to help him._

He at least got him self straightened up enough to have gone and got Emily from Hermione two weeks ago. He had apologized profusely to the girl for having left his daughter with her so long. He knew that he should have never let himself sink so low as to be unable to take care of his own daughter.

Hermione had been pleasant the entire time and just told him it was all right she understood. However she really didn't feel like that since she had to take care of a nearly two year old exuberant child while trying the get her teaching plans ready for the upcoming year. But she felt as if she should keep that to herself since she was pleased to see Draco was better then the last time she had seen him.

At the moment Draco was sitting in the living room reading a book while Emily was running around the room chasing the black and white cat that Harry had gotten her for her first birthday. He was trying to block out his pangs of guilt that he was having but the normally calming effect of reading one of his books didn't seem to do anything for it. Then suddenly, he found a little girl bounce into his lap giggling.

"Fa when can is daddy coming home," the little girl asked staring up at him with her hazel eyes and look of excitement showing on her face.

"Um Emily I," he faltered as he placed the book on the end table. "I really don't know,"

"Can we go see him? I miss daddy."

At this he didn't know what to say. It had been the first time she had asked him about Harry. It had never bothered him before but now he felt his eyes beginning to moist at her excitement and hope that rang out in her voice.

"I don't know if you can visit him honey." Her little face fell in sadness. "If you'd like I will find out in a few days and if you can I will take you," he said not sounding to sure himself.

This brought a huge smile to the Emily's face as she gave him a big hug before climbing back down to chase the cat again.

Draco let out a sigh and begun to wonder what he had gotten himself into. Here he was trying to stay away from his husband and their daughter wants to go see him. It was bad enough that he desperately tried pushing the idea of going to the furthest reaches of his mind but now his daughter brought it to the forefront with just a few words.

Harry was breathing in the warm fresh air as Katie wheeled him out of St. Mungo's. He was excited at finally being allowed out after a couple of months of being locked up in that stuffy room.

They went over to a huge tree a few feet away where Katie put on the breaks to Harry's wheelchair before sitting down next to him on the grass. His main healer and Katie had finally agreed to allow him out after listening to his constant complaining. They both believed that it would do him good, raising his spirits some.

Harry had been depressed the last several weeks as his therapy was going rather slow for his liking. On top of that he had been told that there would be permanent scarring to his face from where the spell had struck him. Then of course there was the matter of his memory and the strange nightmares that he seem to have each and every night.

At first when he started having them he had refused to discuss them with anyone. They frightened him to no end. He would hear someone yelling and screaming at him that he was nothing but a freak or he found himself on a grassy field with strange beams flashing around him and something hitting him. It had gotten to be nearly too much and several times he would break down in tears.

After two weeks of this happening he finally told Katie what was going on. At first she had been shocked at hearing him retell his nightmares but then that changed to joy. She started believing that they were not normal nightmares and was probably snippets of memories. Even though she was overjoyed that this was the most probable thing, she was also slightly worried as he was slowly withdrawing barely working in their sessions.

Today she secretly hoped that he would be happy and start to come out of his shell once again. She turned and looked up at to see him staring off into space. She was beginning to become a little alarmed at this but thought better of taking him back inside.

Once they had gotten outside and under the tree Harry found himself dreaming.

_A large lake spread out in front of him as the sun beat down on him. Sitting under a large tree he stared off into the horizon lost in thought. Things had surely taken a strange twist he thought. _

_He felt at peace here like he could float above the water. Smiling to himself he watched as a large tentacle reached out of the water before splashing back in. _

_He saw a tall red headed boy walking toward him with an excited expression written all over his face as if he was the cat that caught the mouse._

_The boy reaching his side flopped down on the leaves and stretched out his long legs as he placed his arms towards the back and to the sides as a brace. _

"Harry is something the matter," Katie asked sounding worried.

Shrugging off the strange dream he shook his head in a negative response. "No Katie I'm fine but I think I may have had another dream," he replied still staring off into the distance.

"Can you tell me about it?"

He nodded and proceeded to tell her everything that he had seen. "Do you think it is possible that it was some type of memory," hope in his voice.

Katie pondered this briefly before nodding. "Yes I do believe it was. Could you tell anything else about your surrounding other then the lake," she asked. He shook his head no.

"Well I think it's a good start. At least this time it wasn't a nightmare."

"Do you think I may get my memory back," he asked.

"Yes I do think you will but it will probably take time for it to fully return," she said trying to sound hopeful.

That night Draco lay in bed staring up at the ceiling fighting the turmoil that was gnawing at him. He had felt so useless and helpless when it came to Harry at the moment. It was like when he had to be in control of a situation and found that he couldn't. Tears slowly fell down his face as he thought about all of the great and fun times that he and Harry had spent together.

He always hated when he had to admit that deep down inside he was nothing more then a scared child who ran from bad situations, like he did back at Hogwarts. Hell he thought it was Harry who had come to his rescue, standing up to his father when he couldn't even do that. That was the exact day when he knew that he loved the Boy-Who-Lived. It also was when he knew that he could actually be himself and not feel stupid and immature.

But now this was all being brought back up to the surface and by none other then his own daughter. He didn't want to confront this part of him, he had learn to hide it over the years even thought Harry knew all about it.

Sighing deeply he rolled over knowing that no matter what he did he would have to face his demons once again. But this time he was going to do it with sheer determination and the love of both Harry and their daughter.

The following afternoon found Draco once again standing outside of Harry's room. He'd gotten Hermione to baby sit so that he could go. She had given him a reassuring smile along with some comforting words of wisdom.

Now he stood there trying to get the strength to walk in and see his husband. Unsure of what he would see, but some part told him that he had to go inside to explain.

_**A/N **I have been having problems with getting a line inserted for different locations and time in the story. If there is anyone who can tell me let me know in your review._


	7. Coming To Terms

**A/N I hope you all enjoy this chapter it is full of angst.**

Gathering as much courage as he could get, Draco opened the door and walked into Harry's room. His stomach turning in knots as he began question himself about being here.

He cautiously crossed the room and sat down in the small chair that stood by Harry's bed. He was brought up short when he looked at him. Granted Hermione had warned him when he'd dropped Emily off about the deep, dark scars that now covered his face.

Harry's once fuller body now looked thinner as it had during his second year at school. He looked as if he hadn't been eating anything at all, even though Draco knew that this was incorrect. The once beautiful tanned body now looked as pale as his did.

Draco was shocked upon seeing this as he looked as bad as he had the first time he had visited. Something inside him stirred as his mind started to panic. He wanted out of there. There was no way in Merlin's name could he handle this situation.

He struggled with his mind trying to get it under control, fighting that urge to flee. The urge that would always reared its ugly head when he was faced with a situation that he couldn't control.

"No I can't leave, I have to do this for Emily's sake," he muttered. Just then he heard a moan in the bed and realized that Harry was starting to wake. Now the panic grew to a point where he had started to get up and run out.

"Hello," Harry said sleepily as he rummaged for his glasses that had been lying on the small table.

"Um Hi, How are you feeling," Draco asked quietly.

"All right I guess. Do I know you?"

Draco was taken aback at this question he thought that Harry had been regaining some of his memory back. Then he chided himself realizing that he was only regaining bad memories, memories that no should have.

"Yes I'm Draco. I was here to visit you before."

"Oh all right," Harry replied still sounding very sleepy.

The two fell into a comfortable quiet. Draco still wanted to run but knew that he had to confront his demons. He knew that if he couldn't do this, then he'd be letting his daughter down and that was not something that he was about to do.

"Harry, how have you been doing? I heard that you've been in therapy and have been having nightmares," Draco asked unsure if he should be asking this.

"Yea I have been in therapy for a while now I guess. It's tough most of the time, but I manage."

"At least they are helping you." Harry nodded.

Draco noticed that he readily answered his question about the therapy but not the nightmares. Furrowing his brow he wondered why he hadn't answered this. "  
Unless—that's it."

He didn't want to talk about the nightmares. They were probably horrible and were afraid that people would look at him different. Now he definitely felt bad at having not been here to help him through them.

"Harry you can talk to me about them if you'd like. Maybe I can help you," Draco told his husband trying to sound genuine in his offer.

"Why, you probably wouldn't know what they were," Harry snapped staring at Draco.

He was taken aback at Harry's sudden attitude. "Look Harry we've been married for the last two years. I also have known you since our first year in school. I know a lot about your past and if you'd allow me to, I can help you."

Harry didn't say anything lost in his thoughts as he pondered what Draco had just offered. After several minutes he finally nodded and begun to tell this man who claimed to be his husband about the strange dreams and nightmares he had been having.

Draco just nodded in understanding, letting him continue his tale. He was now fully aware of what Harry had been going through the last few months. He mentally kicked himself for being so weak and leaving Harry to his own.

"Harry I believe they are actual memories from your past. The one you said about finding yourself locked in a small cupboard is in fact true." He saw the look of shock that quickly changed to horror on Harry's face. "Before you came to Hogwarts you lived with your muggle relatives. They didn't quite understand about your magic and tried everything to chase it out of you.

"How long did I live with them," Harry asked now sounding curious.

"You lived with them until you were sixteen. And then you moved in with Ron Weasley and his family. That was when we got to know each other and I learned that you were far from being the arrogant, spoiled brat I thought you were. Actually I was happy to finally get to know you and soon realized that I liked you more then just as a friend," Draco replied smiling at the wonderful memory that he was remembering.

"But why can't I remember the good memories," Harry asked mournfully.

"I can't give you an honest answer about that. All I can do is guess that it's because you are just starting to regain memories and these are the strongest ones. Hey did you know that we have a wonderful daughter," Draco asked now changing the depressing talk. Harry shook his head in answer. "Would like me tell you about her?"

"Yes, maybe I'll remember something."

Draco nodded and soon was telling Harry all about Emily. How her hair was auburn that fell just below her shoulders. How her green eyes looked just like his did. He even told him about how she loves to play with her dolls and pretend that they were real people. He even explained that she was a very well behaved little girl who never disobeyed him or any of her babysitters.

Harry laughed at this. She sounded like such a nice little, but he still couldn't remember her.

"Would you like to meet her," Draco asked hopefully. "I could probably bring her tomorrow afternoon.

Harry thought about this for a moment and then nodded his head. "Maybe if I meet her I might remember something."

After another hour Draco left the hospital feeling a lot better then when he'd got there. He walked down the street a little ways smiling to himself knowing that he had finally accomplished something he never thought he would.

**Dhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdh**

The next afternoon Draco found himself being dragged by a two year girl through the halls of St. Mungo's. They had garnered quite a lot of looks from those who were either waiting in the waiting room or walking down the halls. He just rolled his eyes and tried to ask her to slow down. But his plea fell on deaf ears.

They walked into Harry's room to find him sitting up in the bed looking a little happier then he had been the day before.

Emily who had seen him gave a little squeal and ran over to the bed. She quickly climbed up the side of the bed and launched herself into her dad's arms. "Daddy I've missed you," she creid.

Harry just looked down at the happy girl and then at Draco. He obviously couldn't recognize her and didn't know what to say or do.

"Daddy don't you member me," she asked looking up at him pleadingly.

Harry just shook his head no at her unsure of what to say. Meanswhile, Draco looked on with a sad expression he had hoped that maybe she could jog his memory.

"Oh daddy what's wrong. Why can't you member me," Emily cried as she once again flung herself against his chest and began to sob.

Harry now was feeling awful at the sight of this pitiful little girl who wanted him to desperately remember her.

"Then I will help you to member me," Emily said pulling away and looking determined.

"Yes you will help me just like I would help you my little one," Harry said stroking her hair.

Draco suddenly looked at Harry with a look of shock. "Harry you just called her your little one," Draco stammered.

"I-I did," Harry now sounding surprised.

"Harry do you know that that is what you used to call her. Your little one," Draco asked sounding incredulously. Harry just shook his head at him.

Emily in the mean time was looking up at her dad beaming from ear to ear. "She I told you I would help."

**A/N I hope you all liked this one. Draco was finally able to confront his fear and Emily has helped her dad. Please Review when you are finished.**


	8. Preparations

**A/N I just want to apologize for having taken so long in getting this chapter up. It took longer then I had expected to get it the way that I wanted. I hope you all enjoy it.**

Draco had gone to visit Harry nearly every day for the past four months. It was never easy for him because he would always find his love exhausted from that day's therapy session with Katie. He would usually lie there in his bed propped up, his eyes drooping closed yet he would try to fight the exhaustion that his body felt.

By the time he would leave, which was almost always an hour after he had arrived. Draco would have a varying of emotions running through him. On one hand he was pleased, more to the point he was elated that Harry was showing more improvement with each passing day. At the same time he felt sad and worried and you could even say that he was hurt about the progress that Harry was making with his memory.

He hadn't yet remembered anything remotely connected to the two of them. He seemed to take everything that Draco would tell him at face value never thinking that they could all be lies. The one good thing was that Harry was showing some signs of being a father once again and this warmed Draco's heart.

Harry had steadily regained some of his memories allowing him to understand a few of the things that Draco had told him. However, these past memories were never happy ones and were always inevitably horrible ones.

He would find himself having recurring nightmares about a cupboard and some stairs.A short fat man was throwing a young boy into it while telling him he was a freak. And then the door would close and all would be dark. This was where he would always wake up shaking uncontrollably.

There was one though that had taken a toll on him when he started having it about two months ago. He would find himself in some strange room with black cloaked figures all around. There seemed to be a battle going on and he was in the heart of it.

His nightmare would switch and would see a tall black haired man standing on what looked like a ledge battling a woman who seemed to be crazy. The man looked as if he were dodging various colors of light that were coming his way and then all of a sudden one hit him.

Harry would watch helpless as the man fell in slow motion a shocked expression on his face through what looked like some strange veil. He could hear voices shouting from behind it.

He then found himself screaming and shouting at the top of his lungs, "Sirius," This was how the healers found him every night for over a week. And he never would tell them what had happened just as it had been before when he was remembering the final battle.

He had feared that it was some sort of horrible nightmare that had nothing to do with his past as all of the others seem to do. He feared that if he would say something, they'd think he'd lost his mind completely not just his memory. However, after having it again one night the following afternoon he decided to talk to Draco about it.

Draco had listened patiently listening to his husband's shaky voice retelling him about the nightmare. The whole time he could feel his heart breaking inside once again. He knew exactly what the nightmare was of and knew that he was going to have to explain it to Harry. And that was one thing he didn't relish in doing.

It was hard explaining it to Harry and watched the various emotions that crossed his face. He told him about how the Dark Lord had tricked him into going to the Department of Mysteries in their fifth year. How when he arrived there with a few friends they were ambushed by a group of waiting Death eaters. He'd gone on to tell him about how his Godfather and other members of the Order of the Phoenix had come to his aid. He even told him in detail about how his Godfather had been killed by his own cousin.

When he had finished he had tears in his grey eyes and he saw that Harry was now crying and shaking in his bed. He got up and moved over behind Harry on the bed, where he wrapped his arms around the small boy. He just sat there slowly rocking him back and forth and saying soothing words in his ear as he felt the racking sobs that were coming from him.

Draco couldn't help but cry with him. He knew that the original loss of his Godfather had been hard but to have to relive it again was horrible. He just wished that there was something someway that he could help Harry to regain some happy memories instead of all the horrible ones that no one should have to relive.

**Dhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhddhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhd**

It was now a year later and Harry was being released from St. Mungo's. The healers had felt that he'd regained all that he was going to there they had told Draco that he would do better now if he was in a place that was familiar to him.

They had gone to explain that most amnesiacs if they are in a familiar place they would be more relaxed. And being more relaxed would allow their mind to heal thus making it easier for them to regain their memories.

Draco was excited about this turn of events and so had left quite early that day to go and get him. He wanted to be sure that he talked with Katie regarding Harry's treatment and all of the stuff that would inevitably be involved in his well being.

**Dhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdhdh**

At noon Draco and Harry's house was filled with all of the friends including many of the Professors from Hogwarts and a few of the Order members. They were preparing the house for the welcome home party that they were throwing for Harry.

They were aware that he didn't remember them or even the house but to them it didn't matter. They wanted everything to be perfect and felt that this would be a great diversion for him. After all, he had spent the last year in St. Mungo's working hard on therapy.

Molly Weasley was currently running around the kitchen checking on various pots that were magically stirring themselves to the oven where she was checking on various cakes that she was preparing. She was bent on making every kind of food that she knew were Harry's favorites and then some.

On more then one occasion she had found herself chasing someone out of the kitchen. She didn't want to be disturbed and they would only make themselves a pest and distract her from her task. The worse one of them all was her son Ron who would constantly sneak in and try to sneak a fresh baked scone from the plate that she had sitting on the table.

After the tenth time of shooing him out she finally got upset and unceremoniously through him out with a stern warning that if he didn't stop he wouldn't get any of the food. After this incident she had decided to throw up a few locking charms just to insure herself some privacy.

Meanwhile in the small living room which now had been magically expanded to hold of the people, Hermione, Ginny and Tonks were going around putting up various decorations. There were welcome home banners hanging from the stairs, some were floating in the air. They were hanging up small bunches of lilies and even managed to get some pictures of Harry playing Quidditch in school from Colin.

The men on the other hand had chosen sit around on the couches and chairs discussing various topics. Even Professor Dumbledore was enjoying the conversations. They ranged from the usual, Hogwarts and what was taking place there to Quidditch which always ended in heated arguments regarding the best professional team. On more then one occasion when they were arguing heatedly, Hermione would find herself having to stop and threaten to hex them if they didn't keep it down. The men would only give her a glare before going back to their discussion, albeit a little less heated.

There were two males who weren't taking part in any of the discussions as they seemed to be in their own. Fred and George were leaning up against the fireplace, obviously discussing pranks and jokes. They were also probably discussing their shop and how well it has been doing.

There was one person in particular who was sleeping at the moment and that was little Emily. Draco had thought it was for the best if she stayed behind where she would be supervised by many people. At first she wanted to help with the preparations seeing as it was for her daddy.

She had followed Molly into the kitchen and offered to help her. Molly had given her a motherly smile and tried to get the girl to go back out with the others. However, Emily was to stubborn and still tried to help with the baking. Finally, Molly had to push her out of the kitchen after she ended up breaking a dish that was full of flour, spilling it all over the floor.

She then tried helping the girls with putting up the decorations, but she was to small and only ended up getting in the way. Luckily, Remus was there and he took her over to sit with him on the couch. She would end up getting her sides by her Uncle Remus. Now she lay with her head in his lap happily sleeping.

Meanwhile, Molly was busy in the kitchen and had just gone over to the sink when she heard a small pop behind her. The sudden sound caused her to drop the pan that she was currently holding before spinning around. She gave a small shriek when see saw Dobby standing there in the middle of the kitchen.

"Dobby sorry Mrs. Weazey, Dobby didn't mean scare you," the exuberant house elf said as he bounced on his tiny legs.

"That's quite all right Dobby," she said assuring him that she wasn't upset.

"Dobby here to help. Dobby wants to help party for Harry Potter."

"I don't need any help Dobby," she said as she turned back to the sink.

Dobby didn't say anymore and instead he jumped up on the counter next to the stove and began checking the pots. He was mumbling to himself about the soup needing more vegetables. He started conjuring more vegetables, carrots, celery and others to put into the boiling pot.

"Dobby, get away from there," Molly shouted at him, running over to the stove.

Dobby hopped down just as she reached him and ran across the kitchen where she had laid several cakes out. He grabbed one and was going to take it to the table. "Dobby out cakes on table," he said.

"Put that down," she screeched running over to him.

Her yells and screams attracted the others in the living room. Curiously they all got up and headed for the kitchen. They found that she had put up several locking charms just as she screamed again. Now clearly worried they began taking down the charms. There was something clearly going on in the kitchen and they needed to get in.

Just as the last charm was taken down, Molly screeched at the top of her lungs sounding almost blood curdling. They pushed their way in only to stop and stare wide eyed that the woman.

There she was standing in the middle of the room a chocolate cake falling off her face and hair. She was standing there tapping her foot furiously on the floor. She was carefully trying to wipe some of the icing off her face.

Everyone busted up laughing uproariously at the sight of the woman. It was just too much and a couple of them even fell down, rolling on the floor in fits of laughter.

"It's not that funny," she shouted at them sounding exasperated. This only made them laugh even harder.

**A/N **I hope you liked this one. I know that it wasn't full of angst or anything like that but I thought that a little lightness was well deserved. I had tried to figure out how to bring Dobby into the story since I love him and thought this was the best way.

The next chapter will actually be the homecoming for Harry. It will be quite emotional in places.


	9. Going Home

**A/N Here's the next chapter and I hope you all like it.**

Harry had just finished his lunch and was now propped into a sitting position in his bed. He was watching Draco with an amused expression on his face as his eyes followed Draco's every movement. He may not remember the young man prior to being hospitalized, but with everything he had been told by the man and those who came to visit, he couldn't help but feel that his current actions were something that he did quite often.

Draco was pacing back and forth oblivious to Harry's presence. His hands were clasped together behind his back as he muttered incoherently under his breath. It was clear to all that he was quite impatient about the long time he had been kept waiting by the healers. He was also nervous and various thoughts raced through his mind.

Like, why was it taking so long to release Harry. And are they really going to release him. Or did they find something new that isn't good. These thoughts repeated themselves over and over again.

He had expected the healers to have released Harry by this time since it was widely known that they released most patients in the morning. That was what was making him so impatient and nervous. He couldn't help but think the worse and wanted desperately to just take Harry and go home. But he knew that it would be a selfish thing to do, especially since they needed to know what to do for him when they were at home.

Over the past several months Draco had gotten a hold every medical and healing book that he could get his hands on, including muggle ones as well. He wanted to learn and understand everything regarding the severe damage of a person's limbs. This included learning about paralysis, how it affected a person's living condition and those around the person. He also needed to learn how to take care of a person with this kind of handicap and what the various ways of healing these injuries were.

He had found through his learning that the majority of these case a person never fully regained the use of the loss limb. There were even cases where no matter what kind of therapy a person went through, they never regained any use. This was what he was afraid of for Harry, but he wasn't going to let it get him down anymore.

After having thoroughly studied the books he had made a decision to set a room up for Harry, one that would allow him to continue his therapy. He had asked Hermione and Professor Dumbledore for help to add two extra rooms downstairs. One that would be used as a bedroom since Harry would be unable to go upstairs. The other one would be the physical therapy one.

In this one he added many muggle medical apparatus. He made the floor soft with rubber to keep him from hurting himself if he should fall. He added a low table where he would be able to do his exercises including stretches and lifts. He put two metal bars that were parallel two one another to help Harry with his standing up and sitting down exercises. He added some muggle weights for him to use, to help him with his strength. He even added a small swimming pool since he had learned that water therapy was a wonderful way to help with strengthening since a person was lighter in it.

"I wish one of those worthless excuses for a healer would get in here," he whined aloud. 'We can't spend all day here waiting for them to come in here and either release you or tell us they aren't."

"Draco, I think you need to calm down, your pacing isn't helping anything. Your whining and obvious impatience isn't going to get them in here any sooner."

"I am aware of that Harry. But love I want to go home and take you with me. I want to show you the house that we purchased two years ago. And maybe just maybe you will remember something, a small memory might come back," Draco replied sitting down finally in one of the chairs next to the bed.

"You have said that many times now. But you forget that I'm not the only person here that they need to see."

Draco gave a snort and was about to respond to Harry's comments when he heard the door open. He jumped up and whirled around to see who the newcomer was, hoping that it would be a healer. His eyes grew wide and a flicker of fear showed in his grey eyes.

He saw Katie walking in, pushing a strange looking chair. He could see that it had four wheels, two in the back that were rather large and two in the front that were rather small. There was two strange metal things coming off the sides and hanging down close to the floor. He saw that her hands were gripping two small handles that were on the back of it. And it even looked like it had two arm rests on either side.

He took a couple of steps back, bumping into the back of his chair as she drew closer with the strange contraption. "What is that thing," he stammered.

"This Mr. Malfoy is a wheelchair. It allows a person the freedom to get around when they cannot on their own," she replied sweetly as she stopped near him, reaching down and pushing a couple of handles on the big wheels.

All he could do was to give her a slight nod of understanding. He had seen something similar in a few of his muggle books and was fully aware of their use. However, it wasn't the same thing as seeing one up close and he was unsure of it now.

"Now Mr. Potter, I would like to do a full scan before you can be released." Walking over to Harry, her wand all ready out and prepared to perform the necessary scans.

Draco watched in silence as she slowly waved the wand over Harry's entire body several times. With each passing wave she would cast a different spell, which emitted a different light each time. He could see that she was nodding in approval as well. This was a good sign he thought to himself. After several more waves, she extinguished the last spell before placing her wand back into her pocket.

Turning slightly so that both Harry and Draco could see her face and hear what she was about to tell them. "All of your vitals are within normal limits. Your muscles seem to be holding their strength as well. And it looks like a few of the damage nerves have now stabilized in their deterioration.

Now even though this is a good sign, it in no way means that they will get any better or won't begin to deteriorate once again. The kind of damage you sustained has a very lasting impact, one that will continually need to be treated through various means if we are to keep you stabilized.

The first thing will be that you will need to continue taking a strengthening and a pain relieving potion every day. You will also need to continue with your daily exercise routine that we have now been doing for the past several months. I will come to your home three times a week and work with you on this, especially your mobility and strengthening. We cannot allow you to get too complacent in this matter," she said giving him a smile.

Draco gave her a smile at this knowing full aware that she would push Harry at home just as much as she has done here. He was glad that he had made the special room or he would have been forced to bring Harry hear several times a week.

"You will also have to use the wheelchair in order to get around. Even though you have gained some use of your leg, it is by far not enough for you to get around any other way. It would be far too dangerous since you could fall and would more then likely break your hip or something worse," she continued.

Harry could only stare at her in surprise. He had known that he had gotten a little better, but now she made it sound as if they had barely dealt with any of it. He wasn't sure why but a feeling of guilt came over him at this news. He felt like he was going to be a burden to Draco and anyone else who would undoubtedly be involved in his care. And for some reason this was something that he felt adamantly against as if it should be the other way around.

"What do we do in regards to his nightmares and or returning memories," Draco asked the healer.

"Unfortunately, there is much that we can do to help with them. You will need to give him a calming potion whenever he should have one. You can also give him a dreamless sleep potion if he should have any problem getting back to sleep. But I must warn you that he cannot have more then one every two weeks due to the high addictiveness of the potion.

You will also need to find some way to get him to tell you about them and discuss what ever he saw. This is the only way that you can distinguish from a legitimate memory or an actual nightmare. If I may suggest, you can also get in contact with one of the healers here that deals specifically with the brain. They might be able to help you as well in this."

She handed Draco several orders for the potions that would be needed and telling him that he could go down to the first floor Apothecary and get them filled. He accepted the orders, telling her that they would stop on their way out.

Twenty minutes later after having stopped at the Apothecary, Draco pushed Harry out to the waiting blue sedan that he had parked along side the sidewalk. He carefully helped him into the car, having to help lift his damage leg in. Afterwards he stowed the wheelchair into the boot of the car before getting in himself and driving away.

Harry sat silently in the passenger's seat watching the scenery change. The rows and rows of buildings gave way to a beautiful country side. The hills were full of beautiful green grass with large oak and walnut trees. He could even see several varying colors of flowers blooming. He even noticed some birds that were flying gracefully in the air.

He couldn't help but be awed by the beauty of the country. He wondered if he had ever seen anything this fantastic before as they drove over a small bridge that spanned a little river.

A little while later, Draco pulled up in front of the biggest house that Harry could ever imagine. He saw beautifully trimmed hedges running along the property and well manicured lawns on both sides of the driveway. He even saw roses and lilies blooming along the walk.

The house itself was two stories high and painted white that seemed to glitter in the sunlight. A porch with a swing and a couple of chairs protruded out of the house and around the sides. There was a wide balcony that covered the porch as it sprawled to the outer edges of the home. He also noticed a couple of steps that lead up to a light brown door. This made him wonder how he was going to get in.

Draco looked over at Harry and smiled at the awed expression that was covering his face. He gave a chuckle at this sight. "Welcome home Harry. Welcome home," he said.

Harry turned to look at Draco and gave him a goofy smile. His green eyes were dancing with excitement from the words that Draco had said to him.

Draco felt his heart flip a couple of times from the excited look that Harry had given him. He could feel tears begin to fill his eyes but quickly pushed them away. This had been the first time in a long time that he saw Harry give a genuine smile. And it made him feel warm and tingly inside.

"Well I guess we had best be getting inside. I don't think we can stay out here all day," Draco said as he opened the door to get out.

**A/N Well I hope you liked this chapter. The next one will be up next weekend and will be all about the party that awaits Harry inside. Again please review as they help me to keep going.**


	10. The Party

**A/N Please don't kill, I know that I said I would have this chapter up last weekend but when I began to type it I soon found that it just wasn't up to par. The sentimental and angst that I had wanted just wasn't there. So I took this time to rewrite it and I think it is a lot better then it had been. Also, I would like to thank those who reviewed the last chapter.**

* * *

Draco opened the door before pushing Harry into the entry way. Harry couldn't help himself from taking a sharp breath. The entry way was just exquisite or at least that was what he was thinking. The flooring was a light maple that had what looked like various runes etched into it, while the walls themselves were a slightly darker wood that you could see the graining of it. A marble sculpture of a Gryphon stood in the far corner near a low wall that ran to the end of the small area and around the corner. There even was a crystal chandelier hanging down from the center of the ceiling.

Draco glanced down at Harry and smiled at the awed expression on his face. Giving a quiet chuckle he pushed Harry down the hall and towards a couple of wooden doors that were currently closed.

Harry glanced at the doors now looking perplexed. He wondered why the doors were closed and why Draco had stopped In front of them. Just then he gave a small squeak and jumped slightly as he felt Draco's breath in his right ear. He whipped his head up and looked into the man's grey eyes.

Draco gave a laugh at Harry's reaction but he quickly reassured him that everything was all right. He went on and told him that he had a surprise waiting for him behind the doors. Harry nodded uncertainly at this but felt little more reassured when he felt a light squeeze on his shoulder.

Draco reached over and pushed the doors open before pushing Harry inside. All of a sudden many voices rang out, "Welcome Home Harry!" It was a lucky thing that Draco had been there as Harry jumped up into the air, nearly falling on the floor. But Draco had a hold of his shoulder and was able to keep him from actually doing this.

Harry gave a small smile at all of those gathered in the room even though he was unsure of exactly what was going on, let alone who most of these people were. Granted a few of them he remembered from his time in the hospital as they had come and visited once in a while, but most of them were complete strangers. And this was giving him a very uncomfortable feeling and he didn't like it.

He was about to say something to Draco about this but then quickly thought better of it. It really wouldn't do any good if he was to hurt their feelings with his uneasiness he reasoned to himself. And so instead he just gave them the biggest smile he could muster at the moment and hoped that no one noticed his feelings.

Draco however had seen the expression and frowned slightly. He hadn't expected this but then again he wasn't all that surprised either. Leaning down over Harry's shoulder, he quickly whispered some soothing and comforting words.

A few minutes later Harry found himself relaxing on one of the emerald green couches. He was enjoying the feel of the soft material around him. He even admitted to himself that it was much more comfortable then that hard bed he had while in the hospital.

* * *

It didn't take long before he found himself in various conversations with those in attendance. Most of them were all about his health and how he was feeling. Others were asking about what he was going to do now that he was out of the hospital. He tried to be polite and answer their questions the best he could, but it was starting to take its toll on him.

All of these people who supposedly knew him were more worried about his health then he was. He couldn't understand their reasons for this and it was becoming to over whelming for him. He could feel the tears begin to well up in his eyes and a small shiver run through his spine.

He couldn't remember them in anyway and it was starting to really get to him. He hadn't wanted to think about his health or anything remotely connected since he felt horrible about it. To him even though he didn't remember his previous life somehow it felt wonderful and yet horrible at the same time. All of these people who were supposed to be friends were acting like everything was going to be just fine. Like life was somehow going to go back to the way it was before his 'accident' or whatever it was he thought. And somehow he knew that it would never be that way again and this made him sad.

Soon however he was brought of his sudden depressive mood by two tall red heads flopping down one both sides. They looked identical and even seem to finish each others sentence. He assumed that they were twins and definitely overly excitable like they had eaten way too much sugar.

He found himself listening to a story that they had said was one his adventures when he was in school. It was about the day when he had bravely fought a huge dragon with nothing more then his broom. They told him how he had called it forth and then went flying around trying to get to an egg that the Dragon was guarding. He listened attentively as they explained with much enthusiasm about he dodged the Dragon's fire balls that it was trying to hit him with and it's huge tail.

He couldn't help but wonder if this really was a true story as it sounded so fantastic. As they finished he couldn't help but decide that they were embellishing it for his entertainment. In fact he thought maybe it never actually happened. He was about to say something when he heard a squeal from the door way.

He turned his head to see who it was and saw Emily running across the room towards him. Her arms were wide open and she had a huge grin on her face. Before he knew it she had pounced on top of him, giving him a huge hug at the same time. Just then he felt a stab of pain like an electrical shock in his leg. Harry winched slightly but quickly covered up as he didn't want anyone to see this.

This hadn't been the first time he felt this sudden but quick pain. The healers had told him that it was quite a normal thing to happen since some of the nerves hadn't been completely destroyed but only severely damaged. They had gone on to explain that the brain was trying to send electrical impulses through the nerves and that because of the damage, very few would get through and when they did it would be slightly painful.

This was one of those times and he'd thought about putting Emily onto his side instead of allowing her to stay in his lap. But after having seen the excitement and happiness on her face thought better of it and gave her a hug in return. He didn't want to hurt her feelings especially since he could still remember that first day she had come to visit him in the hospital.

"Daddy I'm so happy you're home," Emily squeaked and gave him another hug.

Harry gave a chuckle at the smiling girl. "I'm happy to be here too." He then proceeded to tickle her sides which had sent her into a fit of giggles.

Harry had definitely relaxed and was now having a good time, especially with Emily. The nervousness that he had early was now completely gone and he was no longer fully aware of all the people that were here. However, there was one person that was getting his attention.

He had noticed that all through the day another red headed boy was staring at him very few seconds. He looked familiar to him but he didn't know from where. Since he wasn't able to put a name to the face he chose to ignore the young man and concentrate on playing with Emily.

Ron who was standing over near the fireplace talking with his brother Charlie would glance over at Harry. He wanted to go over and speak with his best friend but found that he had no courage whatsoever. It had been the same way the past year as he refused to visit Harry in the hospital. It didn't matter what Hermione would say to him even when she would accuse him of being worse then Draco had been. He just told her that he couldn't and then would change the subject.

* * *

Since the day of the final battle Ron had been extremely guilty about the way things had turned out. He felt a deep sense of self loathing as he had been unable to stand beside Harry or keep him from getting these injuries. He had promised Harry that he would be there right by his side when he defeated the Dark Lord, but that didn't happen.

He had been engaged in a duel with Lucius Malfoy at the same time Harry began his engagement with Voldemort. His duel with Lucius had become an extremely dangerous and therefore had to focus all of his attention on it. He had been vaguely aware that Harry was having some problems against Voldemort but was unable to help him.

Ron had just dodged the killing curse when he heard the shot of the Incendio curse and Harry's painful screams. He dared a glance and saw Harry on his knees obviously in excruciating pain. He felt his heart stop briefly as he knew that there was nothing he could do to help his 'brother'. I

It was then that he spun back and shouted several curses one after another at Malfoy. He was about to send another one when he pitched forward, unconsciousness taking over.

When he had awakened in the hospital later that night all he could ask was how Harry was. It had been quite a blow to him when Hermione had given him the details of the end of the battle and of Harry's condition. He held back the tears that he felt were coming on as his heart sank at the realization that he was the one to blame.

Since that night Ron had withdrawn as much as he could into himself, always avoiding discussing Harry's condition and going to visit him. Regardless what anyone would say, he just kept his guilt bottled inside and tried avoid discussing it all together, and that included his own feelings.

Now as he stood by the fireplace glancing over at Harry every so often he couldn't help but feel a pull on his heart. He so wanted to go over there and talk with his best friend. To tell him how sorry he was for what had happened to him last year. But he just couldn't get the courage to do it and so went back to talking with Charlie.

Harry who had also been giving Ron glances decided that he was going to have a chat with the stranger. There was something familiar to him and that was what he was going to find out. He put Emily onto the couch and told her to stay there for a moment before he pulled himself into the wheelchair.

Several minutes later he was now sitting in front of Ron near the fireplace looking up at the tall red head. He could see that the man was uncomfortable being around him. He shifted his weight often as he tried not to look at Harry.

"Excuse me, I couldn't help but notice that you were looking at me. Do I know you," Harry asked him.

"Um yes we went to school together and I'm Ron," Ron said his voice giving away just how nervous he suddenly was.

"Well it's nice to see you Ron. You know you do look familiar to me. Didn't we sit underneath a large tree together once," Harry asked now smiling.

This took Ron completely by surprise as he stared down at his best friend. A part of him was overjoyed that Harry remembered something about him, yet at the same time he was frightened. Frightened because if Harry was remembering this, then he would eventually remember what happened at the battle and how he had let him down. He was about to run away when Harry spoke again.

"Why don't you come over to the couch and tell me about some of the things that we did. I would really like that."

Five minutes later Ron was spilling everything he had inside to Harry as they sat on the couch. Tears were flowing down his cheeks as he told him about their adventures at Hogwarts, including the final battle. Through his tears he begged his friend to forgive him for having not helped him like he had always promised.

Harry could only sit there a stunned expression on his face. He was unsure of how to handle this situation; especially since he couldn't for the life of him remember someone telling him that they had failed him and were unable to help him as they had said they would. Finally pulling himself out of his thoughts he looked at the Ron and gave him a small smile.

'Don't worry about it. There was nothing you or anyone else could have done to help me. I really don't remember much about the whole thing, but I can tell you that from what everyone has been telling me, I would not have allowed you to get hurt," Harry told him in a quiet tone.

* * *

Later that night Draco helped Harry into his room down the hall. He had been pleasantly surprised at the size of the room. Three doors came off what was a sitting room with a lovely maroon couch with gold trim around the edges, a small cherry wood desk sat in a far corner. There was even a nice firplace with two chairs positioned in front of it. And at the moment there was a nice warm fire burning inside. The floor looked nice with its dark wood and a couple of small carpets covering it. He could see through one of the doors a bedroom which looked quite inviting Harry thought.

It had been a very long and tiring day he told himself as they made their way into the bedroom. He was looking forward to getting a goodnight's sleep, hopefully away from any nightmares and people waking him up in the middle of the night to check his vitals and such. Climbing into the bed he pulled the covers over his lower body and snuggled down into the pillows. He had just taken his nightly potions and now felt like he could sleep forever.

Later that night Draco who had been sleeping upstairs in his bedroom heard a shrill scream coming from the muggle monitor that had awakened him. Shooting up out of the bed he tore down the stairs towards Harry's room, panic setting in as he heard the screams getting louder.

He wasn't sure what he was going to find but he was hoping that it wasn't as bad as

his mind was thinking it was. Bursting through the doors of the bedroom he skidded to

a halt, his face clouding over in shock and horror at what his eyes were seeing.


	11. Chapter 11

The Nightmare

**I am sorry for such a long delay but many things got in the way, especially writer's block. I hope you all can forgive me for it and like this chapter.**

There on the bed lay Harry in what look like the throws of some horrid nightmare, his entire body writhing in unseen pain and horrors. That is everything but his one leg, which was moving slightly but not with as much force.

Draco unsure of what to do ran over to the bed and sat down beside him. He took Harry in his arms and began to murmur soothing words to him. He could feel Harry's body shaking in his arms as he did this. His mind was racing through emotions as he tried desperately to calm his husband.

He could feel the tears welling up in his eyes as he just held him and watched the nightmare control his love. He had known about the nightmares from the witches at St. Mungo's and at how bad they were. However, he had yet to witness one until now. To him it looked like the visions Harry had had about the Dark Lord. At the time all he could do was hold his beloved and try to calm him down. But now, now looked like it was worse then the others had been.

Draco felt guilt rise up inside him as Harry continued to shake with no signs of waking. He didn't know where this guilt had come from but he was sure that it was coming from the fact that the one he loved was in pain. Oh how he began to wish he could just take it all away.

_**Harry's Nightmare/Memory**_

_He was standing in a cemetery unsure of how he got there. Another boy with brown hair was next to him looking equally confused. It was just then he felt a sense of foreboding and déjà vu as if he had been here before. He was about to turn around when he heard the child like hiss and words, "Kill the spare." _

_Whirling around he saw a green light come out of the shadows and hit the other boy causing him to crumple into a heap on the ground. _

_He was about to go for his wand when he heard another hiss and his wand was flying through the air towards the man. It was then that he saw it was none other than Peter Pettigrew and Voldemort or at least that is what he guessed._

_The next thing he knew he was tied to a tombstone and Peter was taking some of his blood for what he knew was a ritual. He tried to fight the ropes but to no avail as he watched in horror as Voldemort rose from the large cauldron with an entirely new body._

_The next thing he saw was that he had been untied and given back his wand. Voldemort wanted to duel him before killing him in front of his followers who had all appeared to watch his glorious return._

_Harry found himself dodging spell after spell as he cast his own. All he wanted to do was survive and get back to Hogwarts and warn the world that the Dark Lord had returned. However, those thoughts quickly vanished as he was hit with the Crucio spell. He found himself on the ground writhing in untold pain and trying not to scream, but scream he did after a few seconds_.

_**End of nightmare/memory**_

Draco felt Harry's body tense even harder before his head suddenly jerked upwards nearly smashing into Draco's chin and screaming at the top of his lungs.

It took over an hour to get Harry calmed down enough to speak about what his nightmare had been about. Even then he refused to talk about, sighting that he could only remember pain. Draco however knew this was far from the truth but wisely chose not to voice his opinion and instead opted to just hold him and speak soothing words of comfort.

Draco had been tempted to stay the rest of the night with Harry but decided against it. With Harry not having his full memory at the moment he didn't think it would be a wise decision. So he chose to go back to his room and try to get a few hours of sleep knowing that the next day would be a rough one.

Flopping down on the bed he stared up at the bare ceiling his thoughts all jumbled. He was wondering if he could survive and deal with everything that was to come. He knew he wasn't a weak person but at the same time he didn't know if he could be as strong as he needed to be. Not just for Harry but also for Emily.

Draco had been running and hiding ever since he could remember. Running, hiding, pretending because he was afraid to be the person that he knew he could be. He had always acted like a bully towards everyone while secretly admiring many of them. By the time he had been fourteen his running and all had become second nature. He would end up doing it without realizing that he was doing it until it was too late to fix the mess that he would create in his wake.

It had taken Harry in their sixth year to force him to stop running. It was through Harry's persistence that he had found the strength to actually stand up to his father and many others who were at the time trying to control his life. It was through the other boy's strength that he was able to be the person he was today.

When all of this had happened to Harry, his husband he had wanted to run and hide like he had always done when problems arose. But after a lot of conversations and introspection he had come to terms with the aftermath of the final battle and what had happened to his love.

It was that introspection he had found himself trying to help Harry and wanting to keep their love alive knowing that it was going to be a struggle. But now as he lay there staring up at the ceiling he could feel the fear and the need to run away growing. He was beginning to doubt himself and even told himself that.

Seeing one Harry's nightmares or memory had caused this. Even though he knew that they were there and he would probably have many of them he felt that he should never have had to deal with them. That he should be off somewhere lounging in the sun and enjoying a carefree life not here worrying about Harry and trying to help him work through all he needed.

A tear rolled out of his eye as he let out a huge sigh of sadness. He just couldn't handle the situation and he knew it. But what could he do to help the situation after all he had promised Harry that he would always be there for him no matter what and that he would take care of Emily. Upon these thoughts more tears fell as he began to sob quietly.

The next day Emily awoke with a start. She could feel that there was something wrong in her house. She didn't know what it was but it wasn't a very good feeling. Climbing out of bed she padded out of her room and down towards her father's room.

She didn't know why but she felt as if she was being pulled in that direction. It was as if an invisible force was directing her every movement. The feeling didn't scare like it would have many children her age. In fact, the strange feelings felt comforting like a warm blanket on a cold night.

She reached her father's room and quietly opened the door. The first thing she saw was her father lying on the big bed in a small ball. She could see his shoulder's shaking and somehow knew that he was crying.

She ran to him and climbed up on the bed. She put one of her small hands on his shoulder in a comforting gesture. She had seen him and her Aunt Hermione do this and knew that it was a good thing.

Emily didn't like to see her father like this. She wanted the happy father that would play with her and take her to places. She wanted the father that loved her and showered her with many gifts. She hadn't seen that father in a long time and wished that she could somehow do something about it. However she was just a kid and she knew that there wasn't much she could do to help. And this thought made her sad.

Draco, who hadn't heard his daughter enter his room, was crying uncontrollably as everything that had taken place began to take a strong hold on his mind and his heart. He felt so weak and alone that he didn't know what else to do at the moment. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his left shoulder and instantly knew that it was Emily's.

Now his sadness completely vanished and was replaced by embarrassment at having been caught by his daughter in his current state. He had always tried to be strong for her even if he didn't feel that way. She needed him, needed him to be strong, seeing as she was just a child. But now he didn't care if she knew. There was no way he could continue to look and act strong with what was happening in their lives.

He slowly lifted his head from his hands and looked into his daughter's face. He noticed that she a small frown on her face as she just sat there by him. He could the love and warmth that she had for him. It was a welcoming feeling as it washed over him and entered his heart.

"Father, are you okay," Emily asked her tiny voice filled with concern.

"Yes Emily I am okay," Draco replied with a small smile on his face.

"What is wrong? Is it daddy?"

"Nothing is wrong sweetheart. I am just tired and a little sad at the moment, but I will be all right."

"O-Kay," she said not sounding convinced at all. "I have to go to the bathroom but I will be back. Will you be okay?'

"Yes Emily I will be fine. You just go and use the bathroom before you go back to bed. You really shouldn't be up," he scolded her even though a smile was on his face.

Emily smiled back at her father before climbing off the big bed and heading out of the room. She reached the door before stopping and turning back to her father.

"Everything will be okay father. You just have to believe," she said before turning back and leaving the room.

**I hope you all liked this chapter. I'm not sure when the next chapter will be up. I will strive to get it up as soon as possible and not have it be as long in between updates. Please review and let me know if you liked it.**


	12. A Conversation and A Denial

**A/N I would like to thank Chaeli for reviewing the last chapter. I hope I can get more on this chapter.**

The past week had been quite draining on Harry seeing as how he was having nightmares every single night. He hadn't had this many even in the hospital while he had been stuck there. He couldn't understand the meaning behind them or why he was having so many. It was as if being in this house was causing them to occur. But why was the question that plagued his mind everyday and that worried him. He just wished that he could understand if they were just random nightmares or possibly parts of his memory returning.

If they were the latter he didn't want to know. They were too horrid, to depressing and just plain scary he would tell himself. No they couldn't be memories he would think as if he said it enough then it would be true.

Last night he had awakened once again screaming and shaking from yet another one. This one was just as horrid as before.

_Dream _

"_I don't know what you think you are doing boy, but I have told you I will not put up with your freakiness."_

_A huge burly man shouted at a small dark haired boy as he hauled him through the house by his collar. The man's face looked like a cross between a bright purple plum and a red apple._

"_But I didn't do anything. I swear uncle," the boy whined as he was dragged across the hard floor._

"_You are nothing but a liar! We took you in out of the graciousness of our hearts and this is how you repay us. You use your freakiness to hurt my son. How dare you misbehave," the man screamed as spittle came out of his mouth._

"_I swear I didn't do anything," the boy again whined._

_The man stopped dragging the boy once he reached a door underneath the stairs. He quickly opened it and only darkness was visible. _

"_You will stay in there until I see fit to let you out. That means no food and no water. I will not have you going around using your freakiness whenever you want to," the man sneered as he roughly shoved the small boy in to the darkened room._

_End of Dream_

Harry had sat bolt upright screaming no as he shook violently. He soon found himself in Draco's comforting arms. He could hear the blond man telling him that everything would be all right and other soothing words.

It had been like this since the first night that he had been in this house. He'd go to sleep only to wake up from a nightmare and Draco right there to hold him and comfort him. It would take him quite awhile to calm down enough so that he could go back to sleep and also trying to avoid telling Draco about them.

The dreams were disturbing and causing him to slowly fall into depression. He would never speak about them only to tell Draco that he couldn't actually remember what they were about, except that he did remember. He remembered everything about the nightmare and that is what scared him the most. They just couldn't be real is what he would tell himself.

Draco was beginning to get extremely concerned about Harry's nightly nightmare. It was beginning to throw him off from his nightly sleep. Sleep that he needed badly if he was going to take care of both Harry and Emily in the way that they needed him. He was also getting extremely frustrated that Harry refused to speak about them. Oh he knew or at least had pretty good guess that Harry remembered his nightmares. But it wasn't that knowledge or even an educated guess that frustrated him, no it was the fact that Harry would lie to him about them and refused to say anything regarding what they were about.

He was truly beginning to wonder if he could handle this. He had always been a strong person on the outside. Giving the appearance of a very strong willed, determined man but that was far from the truth. The truth was that inside he was just like anyone else with fears and insecurities. It had taken a lot for him to slowly open up to Harry when they were in the middle of their sixth year at Hogwarts. He had been raised never to show his emotions as they were a sign of weakness, but that had slowly changed when he decided that he wanted to go out with Harry.

Harry had been the stronger of the two. Always there for his friends, helping them with whatever problem they had. All the while keeping as much of his own problems locked away, hidden from the world as they didn't matter as much as others did. But now it was the other way around and Harry needed him to be strong like he had used to be. However he wasn't so sure if he could do that.

This train of thought had brought him back to the first night that Harry had come home. He had felt so weak and useless as he sat there trying to comfort his love from an awful nightmare. A nightmare that he was pretty certain was a small memory returning.

Later that night he had been in their bedroom crying when Emily had come wandering in. He was so grateful for the little girl who was so loving and tender. He had tried to put on a brave face for her, not wanting her to know anything about what was happening with her other father. But somehow she seemed to know, just like she always knew things. He then remembered her parting words that everything would be okay. He could only hope that it was true.

Currently the three members of the house were sitting around the small dinning room table enjoying their breakfast. Emily was trying to be as neat as possible for a child of her age and not get her porridge all over the place. Harry was nibbling on a piece of toast, his green eyes were darker then usual and he appeared to be in a haze, possibly lost in some thought. Draco meanwhile was just sitting there quietly watching the rest of his family as he tried to get a grip on his emotions, especially his fear about being able to handle what was happening and what inevitably would.

"Um Draco can I ask you something," Harry suddenly asked his voice quivering with uncertainty.

"Of course Harry, you can ask me anything," Draco replied as he took a sip of his tea.

"Well, it's just; I mean I was wandering if you could tell me more about my past. I mean you've told me a lot but I get the feeling that you haven't told me everything," Harry asked his voice now full of uncertainty.

This brought Draco up short. His face had a look of pure shock on it and it looked as if he had paled considerably. This was definitely not what he had expected Harry to ask him. It wasn't that it would never come up, but he thought that it would come up later.

He had of course told Harry about his life prior to waking up in the hospital, but had glossed over many of the more horrible and terrifying aspects. At the time he like the healers didn't believe that Harry was ready to hear about all of that. Mainly they were unsure of how he would handle it.

Most of the time when he'd had a nightmare or what turned out to be a memory when he would talk about them was mostly about the dark times in his life. This had startled Draco and the others because they had believed he would also have memories returning of good times, times that we filled with love and fun. However, that had yet to happen and it worried Draco.

Draco couldn't help but think back to a wonderful and rather eventful night in the Astronomy tower during the holidays of their sixth year.

_**Flashback**_

_It was nearing midnight and Draco was currently sitting on one of the window sills in the tower awaiting the arrival of his love, Harry Potter. He was currently swinging his legs over the edge not worried that he could fall out since he was aware that there were spells on it to protect these things from happening. Giving a slight shiver from the cold air, he pulled his dark green cloak tighter as he wasn't thrilled in getting a cold._

_He was currently lost in thoughts about Harry. He had of course known quite a bit about his boyfriend's home life. They had talked many times about those kinds of things. Hell, he had told Harry a lot about his own home life and growing up in the Malfoy family. However, he couldn't help but suspect that many things were being kept from him. After all, he knew that he was doing the same thing, afraid to tell the other about every in its entirety because they didn't want to lose the other one as they had slowly been falling in love with one another over the past several months. Well, at least he was doing this and suspected that Harry had been doing the same._

_He was trying to decide if he should just toss his irrational fear away knowing that it was just a weakness and as he was a Malfoy wasn't supposed to show and weaknesses. Still at the same time he wasn't sure if he could that, not after Harry was starting to show him that weaknesses were okay, that they were just a part of who you were. _

_It was at this thought he suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder. Since he had been such deep thought, he jumped nearly three feet in the air and screamed like a girl. He heard the unmistakable laugh of Harry as he turned around to see only his boyfriend's head and the laughing smile that was plastered on his face._

"_Merlin Harry, please don't do that. You nearly gave me a heart attack,' Draco chastised._

"_I'm sorry Draco but I couldn't resist,' Harry said still laughing as he sat down beside him._

"_It's a little cold up here isn't," Harry replied absentmindedly as he pulled his cloak tighter and placed his left arm around Draco._

"_Yes, yes it is but you know as well as I do it's the safest place for us to meet. It's not like we can be seen together by anyone without causing more problems.'_

"_I know but I just wish we could,' Harry said with a sigh._

"_Well until I get the strength to actually turn on my father I can't do that. You know as well as I do that he would kill me or allow the Dark Lord too,' Draco said sounding sad._

"_Then we will just have to wait until the time comes. But I am afraid that it will come before we want it too. You know Ron and Hermione are beginning to get suspicious as to why I keep disappearing at night."_

"_I know the Weasel and the Mud—Granger would be by now. It seems as if they are desperately trying to keep a hold of you as if you were some kind of animal."_

_Harry laughed at this comment. "Well, until we decide to tell them and everyone else they will continue to be suspicious. But you know it is kind of nice to have people worry about me. I mean well I didn't really have a good," and with that said Harry drifted off into silence._

_Draco noticed this right away. And now his suspicions were true, Harry was keeping secrets. A part of him was upset that secrets were being kept from him, especially since he hated that and had told Harry this before. However, there was another part that seemed almost understanding and saddened that this was happening. _

_He quickly made a rash decision, one that would have been worthy of a Gryffindor. "Harry, I know that you haven't been telling me everything about you life with your Aunt and Uncle. I mean I know that you have said they don't like and all, but there is still something that you aren't saying. I would like you to tell me everything because I really like you a lot and would like to be there for you, but I can't if you don't open up about all of the things that you are dealing with,' Draco said softly as he turned to look at Harry in the face._

_Harry dared not speak at the moment as he was to taken aback by Draco's revelation. Of course he knew that he was hiding things, things that he would rather never remember or ever have to talk about. As he mulled this over he soon came to the decision that he really should talk about it with someone. It wasn't like his friends hadn't been telling him that for awhile now. Still even though he had told them and Draco many things he had left many others out. He was too afraid that they would look at him just like his "so called" family does. And that was the one thing that he never wanted to have happen. These people so far cared and stood by him all of the time and knew that it would kill him if he were to lose them._

"_Harry, please tell me everything. I would really like to know it all. It won't change how I feel about you,' Draco said as if he could understand Harry's thoughts._

_Harry looked at Draco with glassy eyes as he just stared ahead almost like he didn't see the blond there. _

"_Hey I have an idea Harry. Since, we both feel so strongly about one another and I know that I haven't told everything I suggest we make a pact. A pact that says we will tell each other everything about the other no matter how bad it is and that it will always stay that way. We could even make it a magically binding contract if that would make you feel better."_

"_At that Harry slowly nodded his head before he began to speak. "Draco I will tell you everything but I don't think we need a contract. I mean if we really are going to try and make this work then I guess we should lay everything out on the table,' Harry said and saw the confusion on the other's face. "It's a muggle phrase that means we tell each other everything, that way there are no secrets."_

_Draco just gave him a small nod in understanding but his face still clearly said that he didn't_ _understand._

"_I guess I should go first,' Harry said as he took a deep calming breath to center himself for what he knew was going to be a long night. He just thanked whatever God was out there that it was a Sunday tomorrow and he didn't need to get up early_

_**End of Flashback**_

Draco was quickly brought out of his memory when he heard Harry clearing his throat in order to gain his attention. He also heard his daughter giggle at this.

Looking up at Harry he steadied himself for whatever he was about to be asked. "What would you like to know Harry?"

"You've told me quite a few things about my life, like some of the things that happened when we were in school. You've also helped explain some of the nightmares that I have had as true memories, but you haven't really spoke about what my life was like before school. I mean do you know what it was like because I would really like to know,' Harry asked trying to keep any enthusiasm at of his voice.

"Yes Harry I do know about your life before Hogwarts. We sat many nights talking about it and what happened. But I don't know if I should tell you yet. I mean it's just that many unpleasant things happened in your childhood and I don't know if it would be wise at the present to tell you,' Draco said trying to stay calm and not let on that once again he was nervous, extremely nervous.

Harry was surprised at Draco's reply. For some unknown reason he thought that the blond who he believed was supposed to be his husband would tell him the truth and never dance around it. At this thought his mood changed and he began to get upset. He needed to know, he needed to understand if he were to ever heal fully.

"Draco some of the things may be unpleasant as you said, but I want to know. I have a right to know since I can't bloody well remember," Harry spoke through clenched teeth.

Draco gave a huge sigh of defeat and nodded his head in understanding. "Just please listen to me when I say its nit pleasant and that it doesn't change who you are. Also, please hear me out before you say anything."

With that said Draco began to tell him all about his life with the Dursleys. How he had lived in a small cupboard until he was eleven. How his cousin enjoyed beating on him and playing a game that he called Harry Hunting. He told him all about how they fed him very little and made him do all the chores around there home. He even went on to explain that they had called him freak all of the time and how he should have died along with his parents. The entire time Draco's voice was becoming emotional as tears were starting to flow from his eyes. This had been the one thing he had never wanted to do. He had made it a goal several years ago not to hurt Harry in anyway. But now he knew that he was doing just that, he was breaking his goal and oath that he had taken with himself. He had never told Harry about this but now it was clear to see with the look of anticipation mixed with fear. He really did not want to do this afraid of how Harry was going to react but he knew that he had no other choice.

"What would you like to know precisely,' Draco asked.

"I would like to know what my life was like before we met. I mean before I went to school. It's just, well I don't remember anything and you've told me many things about what our lives were like in school. But you have never tried to help me with my life before that and I was curious," Harry said lowering his down to the table. He could feel his pulse beginning to race and he wasn't sure why. He couldn't decide if it was from the possibilities of finally learning more about his lost past or maybe fear. All he knew was that he needed to know, especially with all of these nightmares that he was having.

Draco took a deep breath and slowly let it out as he tried to decide where he should start. There was no getting out of now and he knew it. Oh how he hated being backed into a corner and now he was in one. All he could hope for was that Harry, his love would not take it to hard.

"I guess I should start by explaining that you lived with your Aunt and Uncle until you were seventeen. They weren't the very nicest people you would ever want to meet. They seemed to almost take a perverse pleasure out of hurting,' Draco said. "Oh no they didn't physically hurt, like beating or anything like that, but they did hurt you," he quickly explained when he saw the look of horror cross over Harry's face.

"From what I understand for the first ten years that you lived with them you lived in a cupboard that was under the stairs. You were given very little food and expected to do all of the work around the house. It got a little better when you got your school letter because they moved up to a small bedroom. However, after he hated being backed into a corner and now he was in one. All he could hope for was that Harry, his love would not take it to hard.

"I guess I should start by explaining that you lived with your Aunt and Uncle until you were seventeen. They weren't the very nicest people you would ever want to meet. They seemed to almost take a perverse pleasure out of hurting,' Draco said. "Oh no they didn't physically hurt, like beating or anything like that, but they did hurt you," he quickly explained when he saw the look of horror cross over Harry's face.

"From what I understand for the first ten years that you lived with them you lived in a cupboard that was under the stairs. You were given very little food and expected to do all of the work around the house. It got a little better when you got your school letter because they moved up to a small bedroom. However, after you returned from your first year at school they put bas on your window and refused to allow you out. That is except to do the work around the house and cook their meals. You never had any real clothes because they refused to buy you any and only gave you your cousins old hand me downs. Another thing you weren't allowed to have any toys or even watch the television as you were a freak to them."

It was at the point anger and denial welled up inside of Harry. All his nightmares were true not just some form of normal type of nightmares that most people would have. Now they were indeed memories, memories of his horrid past and they were coming back to haunt him.

"No!"

"What," Draco asked a little surprised at the outburst.

"You are a liar," Harry screamed as he backed his wheelchair up slowly. Right now all he wanted to do was get away as fast as he could.

"Harry I am not a liar. I love you and would never do that to you," Draco said now realizing what was going on in Harry's mind and feeling utterly lost once again.

"Yes you are you are a liar. None of that happened. I don't know what you want with me but you are a liar," Harry shouted as he backed out of the room and moved as fast as he could towards his room.

**Well here it is and I hope you liked it. Please review and let me know. Yes next chapter should be quite emotional if not more then this one.**


	13. Pain and Misery

**A/N I want to first thank those who reviewed the last chapter. It was definitely not the best one I've done and I hope that this one is much better. Please let me know if it is in a review.**

Harry made it to his room just barely as he was breaking down completely. Getting inside he pushed the door closed before he fell out of his chair into a crumpled heap. Harry's entire body began to shake uncontrollably as he cried harder then he ever had before. His entire world or that he had been aware of as of now had come undone, unraveled like a crocheted blanket.

Up to now he had accepted what everyone had told him about is life or at least he thought he had. Of course they only told him about the final battle and his time at Hogwarts. They explained that he was a great wizard who had fought bravely and saved many lives. They had told him of Draco and Emily. How they were married and how they had Emily. It was also explained that he would be probably getting his memory back slowly as things returned. Oh how they were right about that one, but what they didn't know was just how he would take the returning memories.

Up until now what Harry hadn't realized was that only a part of him had actually accepted the explanations that he had been given. It was strange as he had believed that he did accept them but with what he had learned just awhile ago from Draco about his life with the Dursleys only brought it all home that he had indeed not accepted them fully.

It was that realization that has brought him to his knees figuratively. All of the pain from his nightmares and questions that he had held within now bubbled forth and was yearning to be released.

He laid there on the floor crying as hard as he could, his chest was hurting from the pain of his cries as well as his heart. His brain screaming that it wasn't possible, that his past had been better then that. It just had to be, no one could have survived what he obviously had gone through.

It was this pain that was causing him to wish for death. He wished that he had not been saved that night of the battle. That they had allowed him to go to sleep forever, where all of this pain and heartache was gone. His entire mind was now falling apart and there was nothing he could about it.

Harry was scared, scared to accept these memories, to accept all of the pain that he had lived with when he had once remembered them.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHHP

Meanwhile, down in the kitchen Emily was staring at her father with wide eyes that had unshed tears in them. She had never known what her dad's past had been other then when he and her father had been in school. Being the inquisitive child that she was she had repeatedly asked her father. But he would only tell her that she was too young to understand and in time would find out. This answer had never appeased her curiosity but she had refrained from asking any further.

Now however she had found out and it made her own heart cry out in pain. Her dad was such a wonderful person just like her father. She couldn't remember much of him but what she did was always pleasant.

She had been so happy when her dad came home. She knew that he had been hurt and had other health problems as her father had sat her down and explained this to her. She didn't quite understand it all as she was just a child but she understood enough to know that her dad was not going to be the same as she remembered. Still that didn't stop her from being excited and wanting him there with her and father.

Emily slowly climbed off her chair and gave a small glance at her father who had his head held down and was holding it in his hands. She wanted to say something but didn't know what to say. Instead she turned and ran out of the room and down the hall towards her dad's room. For some reason she knew he needed her much more then her father did at the present time.

Emily ran as fast as her little legs would carry her. She tried to stop quickly in front of his door only to slide slightly away from the door and towards the wall. Luckily, she was able to keep from colliding with the wall as she reached out her arms to stop the impact. She quickly collected herself and hurried up to the door. She was just about to open it when she heard crying from within and this puzzled her. She had never seen or at least couldn't remember ever hearing her dad crying.

She carefully opened the door and pushed it so that it would open to allow her to get in. It was after the door had swung open when her eyes filled tears and they began to fall. She saw him lying there on the floor shaking and crying. He looked so sad she thought as she ran in and fell to her knees by his side.

The little girl didn't know what to do at this point as she watched him cry and shake. She could feel the tears falling down her cheeks and the taste of salt on her lips as they made contact. Gently reaching forward she patted Harry's shoulder reassuringly. Trying to comfort him in the only way she could think of.

HHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

Back in the kitchen Draco was doing the same exact thing as Harry was. Only instead of being on the floor his head was buried in his hands and he was shaking and crying. He felt even worse then when he had heard that Harry, his love had been severely injured in the final battle. This time however instead of feeling just useless, he felt hopelessness and despair deep within.

This stemmed from what Harry had shouted at him before leaving the room. How Harry had never said those things once they had gotten together. At that time they had made a pact never to lie to one another as they had to build trust if their relationship was to ever work out. At the time it had been hard for him as up until then he had always hidden his feelings, his emotions, everything that actually made him human. But once they had and he had been able to begin to trust Harry and himself, he found it to be easier and now here he was, the real Draco Malfoy.

His brain was telling him how it was understandable for Harry to act the way he did. It was just a normal reaction to having heard more about a lost past, especially when it wasn't the best of one. Still that didn't help him from feeling depressed and lonely at least that is how his heart was feeling.

He didn't know how long he had been like this when Emily came running in the room screaming his name. Looking up at his daughter with red eyes and a tear stained face he looked at her and silently asked what was wrong.

"Its daddy, he's hurt," Emily cried sounding as if she too had been crying.

"What do you mean little one," Draco asked not comprehending what she was telling him.

"Father, its daddy, he's in his room on the floor and he's hurt," the little cried.

This finally sunk in and Draco was up like someone had shot him from a cannon. He ran through the doorway nearly knocking his daughter and ran down the hallway. The only thing now on his mind was that he had to get to Harry. He had to make sure he was all right. All thoughts of his own misery and pain was temporarily gone as he ran down the hall way.

Running into the room he stopped and with a look of horror appearing on his face he took in the scene before falling down to the floor. He was now once again crying as he pulled Harry into his arms. He gasped as he took one loof his love's face and the blank eyes that were looking up at him. Yes he was crying and that was obvious but his eyes held and told another story.

His eyes showed no emotion as if someone had ripped his soul out. He made no movements whatsoever as he was pulled into the strong embrace. The tears were still streaming down his face and it looked as if he was dead.

Draco began to slowly rock Harry as he softly told his love that he was there and that everything would be fine. His own tears falling harder as he did cradle and rocked Harry as if his very own life was on the line. Silently he prayed to what ever deity was listening that they would help them with the struggle that was on its way. He prayed that they would get through this stronger and better then they ever had been.

Just then Emily came running in and over to her father's. She fell down on the floor and with Draco opening one of his arms she fell into his embrace as she too cried.

HPHPHPHPHP

Unknown to them all Hermione Weasley had stepped through the floo. She had decided earlier that morning she would come and see them as it had been awhile since she had visited them or even heard from them in anyway. She wanted to make sure everything was all right and see how Harry's therapy was coming along as well as his memory returning.

Glanicng around the study she didn't see any of them at all. Taking a look at her watch she saw that it was ten o'clock in the morning and this surprised. She had figured they would be in here as they would have been waiting for the therapist. This now had a little worried and so she headed for the kitchen.

In the kitchen she too found it to be empty and now her confusion was increasing. Tunring on her heel she headed for the staircase and up to where she knew Draco and Emily's rooms were.

Reaching the lading she called out their names, but didn't reviecve a reply. So she headed for each room and checked them. Once coming back out of Draco's room she had a worried look on her face. There was no one around and no clue that hey had been. She headed back down the stairs trying to wrack her brain as to where the three would be. It was then that she thought of Harry's room and so raching the first floor she turned and headed down the hall.

She had just reached the door, noticing it opened and guessed that they were all in there. It was also at the precise moment that she heard the crying from within. Now her earlier worry was full blown panic as she ran into the room.

She stopped dead in her tracks and gasped, quickly covering her mouth. There in front of her were the three that she was looking for all huddled together crying. She could see that Harry was just lying there while Draco was rocking him. She could hear his words of love and encouragement. This only brought tears to her own eyes. Not wanting to disturb them she stepped back out into the hall.

She started to go back down the hall deciding that they needed to be alone. However she only made it a few steps before her legs gave out and she collapsed on to the ground. She drew her knees up and began to cry and slowly rock herself as the pain of what she had just seen hit her.

The normally bossy know-it-all cried for the loss and heartbreak that her friends were going through. She cried for the pain that she knew they were having and how they should never have to have gone through this. She cried for Harry knowing that he was so obviously not fine to be here in this house. She cried for the despair that she felt knowing that for once in her life she was unable to help her best friend. She cried for the innocence that he had lost all these years and had only ever wanted happiness. She cried for the knowledge that he would never have that happiness he so rightfully deserved after what he'd gone through.

**Well here it is. I hope you liked it. Please review and let me know what you think. If you have any questions feel free to ask.**


	14. An Idea That Will Help

**A/N I would like to thank those who took the time out to read my stories and a great thank you for those who reviewed.**

**I just want to note that the last chapter to some of you may have been like a giant pity party. That was not what I was trying to get at. I needed a chapter where Harry was forced in a way to deal with his returning memories. In this Draco and I added Hermione had to see that their way of helping him was not the way. You cannot just talk about it and expect someone to fully accept what they are being told, especially when all of the memories are of bad events.**

**This chapter will not be dark at all or maybe a little. So please review and tell me how it went. With all that said, it's on with the show.**

Later that evening after Draco had gotten Harry into his bed after having called the therapy off for the day was sitting next to him lightly carding his black hair. He could see that his love was still hurting as his eyes betrayed him, but this time with a more determined mind set Draco wasn't going to just sit back and expect Harry to accept what they said or keep things to himself.

Draco silently berated himself for this as he knew the raven haired boy always had done this, his emotions and pain and it was now obvious that he was still doing this. He wasn't a Slytherin for nothing and he would use every piece of cunning he could muster to help him through this, especially for all of their sakes.

"Harry, my love, I am sorry that I didn't tell you sooner. I wish you had told me about your nightmares. And since you still haven't I can only guess that what I explained to you had something to do with them. I know that you are still denying them. I can see it in your wonderful green eyes. But love you cannot just run from them like you are trying to do. Oh yes I know that is what you are doing. If it wasn't you wouldn't have broken down like you did. These returning memories of yours I'm afraid are only going to get worse but I will help you to understand them and deal with them.

I made you a promise a few years ago and I intend to keep it. That promise was to never lie to you and always be there. I know I haven't been there the way I should have. I should have been pushing you harder to explain your nightmares. Hell, I should have actually sat you down and explained more of your past to you before this happened. But I just couldn't because I was too happy that you were alive and here with me and Emily.

I'm going to make you another promise right now. I promise to tell you everything about your past, the good and the bad. I will be there every step of the way to help you deal with them. But love you have to promise me something," Draco said. He noticed that Harry looked over at him with a curious look even though he was trying to keep his face void of all emotion.

"I need you to promise that anytime you have a nightmare that you will come to me and tell me about it. If you don't I cannot help you. Please promise me that you will do that," Draco almost pleaded with Harry.

Harry stared at him for a few minutes mulling over what he was just told and asked to do. Finally he nodded his head and replied, "I promise you I will try. But it's so hard to know that these horrible nightmares that I have been having are real, that they actually happened to me."

"I know love, I know. I just wish that you could have had a better life then you did," Draco said and pulled Harry into a hug. He felt Harry tense a little at this but didn't say anything.

Draco was about to leave the room when Harry asked him a question. "Could you tell me about some of the better times that I had in my life. I know that it couldn't be as bad as I've seen or been told," he asked shyly.

"Of course I will. You did have some fun times," Draco said and walked back over to the bed and sat back down.

"Well as you know all ready we didn't get along that well until our fifth year at school. Up until then I was a down right ass to you and your friends. I loved picking on you guys, calling you names, trying to hex you, taunting you into dueling. I did a lot of things to hurt you. I still have never figured out why I did but I believe part of it had to do with how you rebuked my hand in friendship our first year of school. Any way in our fourth year I was taunting you pretty bad about putting your name in the Goblet of Fire," He said Seeing Harry was about to ask about that he quickly added, "I know I have told you many of the things about school but that and I promise I will later but not right now." Satisfied that Harry accepted this he continued. "Anyway this one day I don't really recall exactly what I said but I believe we were in one of the halls when I started taunting. Well we had a Defense professor by the name of Moody that year. What none of knew was he was a Death Eater and I will explain more of that later. Well you were getting quite angry at me and that only fueled me more. What I didn't know was that Moody had come around the corner and heard me. The next thing I knew I was turned into a white ferret and was being bounced against the walls. I was lucky that Professor McGonagall came shortly and made Moody change me back. I along with my so called friends at the time high tailed out of there as fast as our legs would carry us. I recall you standing there just laughing your head off. Later on I was called the bouncing white ferret."

Harry gave a laugh at this as he imagined Draco being a white ferret and being bounced around. Draco smiled back and was glad that Harry seems to accept it and actually laughed about it.

"Can you tell me more," Harry asked giving a huge yawn.

"I will tell you more but not tonight. After your breakdown and mine I think we should go to sleep. But if you'd like I can tell you more tomorrow. You know you have a session as well," Draco added.

"Yes I know. I am tired so I guess I'll just have to wait until tomorrow." With that Harry snuggled further down into the blankets and closed his eyes.

Draco leaned over and gave him a quick kiss on the forehead before standing up and leaving the room.

Walking towards the stairs he gave a big yawn too as the days events caught up to him. He had wanted to give Harry a kiss on the lips, but he discarded that idea as he was unsure if Harry had accepted their relationship or not. Climbing up the stairs, he guessed that he would have to talk to Harry about that tomorrow as well.

He was about to go into his room but decided to go and check on Emily. She had been very distraught earlier when he had put her to bed. He had tried to explain some of it to her but even though she was smart for her age some of it still went over her head. He also recalled how she was worried about Harry. He had reassured her, the best he could that Harry was all right and would get better now that he'd broken down.

Stepping into the room and casting a Lumos, not a very strong one as he didn't want to awaken her. He was able to see that she was laying on her side, with her favorite teddy bear in her hand and her thumb in her mouth sound a sleep. He couldn't help smiling at the way his daughter was sleeping. Now assured that she was soundly asleep he turned and headed back to his room to get a good night's rest, he just hoped that Harry wouldn't have another memory return tonight.

Draco crawled into the big bed and pulled up the blankets to just below his chin. His eyes were slowly closing on their own as sleep started taking him over. Rolling over on his left side he made himself a little more comfortable and allowed his eyes to finally close. However they soon popped open and he sat straight up in the bed. An idea had popped in his head. He couldn't help smiling at the idea as he knew that it would actually be the best way to help Harry.

He just had to figure out how he was going to go about it as he didn't have what he needed. Then he remembered Granger and how she could get what he needed tomorrow. He also thought that she and Weasley would be more then willing to help as well. Soon a huge smile spread across his face as he lay back down and fell a sleep.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

Draco awoke and cast a tempus to see what time it was. His eyes widened as he saw that it was all ready eight in the morning. He cast the countercharm before hurriedly getting up and heading for the bathroom.

While he was taking his morning shower which always took him a half an hour he was muttering various things to himself. "How could I have slept so later? I'm such an idiot. I should have been up over an hour ago. I left Harry and Emily alone. Merlin I am a true idiot. Oh for Merlin's sake I'm turning into Weasley."

Once he had finished his shower he decided he didn't have the time to fix his hair and let it juts fall down around his face. Nearly running over to his wardrobe he swung it open and grabbed a green robe before throwing it on. Forgetting his shoes and all he ran out of the room and towards Emily's to she if she was there. He hoped that she was still asleep as he was always leery of leaving her alone.

Running into the room he stopped dead in his tracks as if someone had hit his feet with a sticking charm. Emily was not in her bed and there was no sign of her at all. A look of fear graced his elegant features before spinning around and running toward the stairs to go see if she was in the kitchen.

Once he reached the first floor he changed his mind and quickly headed down the hall towards Harry's room.

Nearly running in to the room he saw Emily sitting there on the bed smiling and talking animatedly to Harry. He could see Harry was smiling and laughing at their daughter. A wave of relief hit him washing away his worry that had filled him.

Walking over to them he sat down behind his daughter and grabbed her around the waist causing her to squeak in surprise. "What are the two of you talking about," Draco asked.

"I was telling Daddy about when you fell down the stairs last week," Emily answered with a giggle.

Draco smiled at his daughter before reaching up and ruffling her hair.

"That wasn't funny and you know it. I forgot your Daddy's session when I was upstairs putting the clothes away. I can't help that I tripped over my own feet,' Draco cried indignantly but with a smile on his face.

"It was still funny," Emily replied back and giggled some more.

"So how did you sleep last night Harry," Draco asked, changing the subject.

"Okay I guess. I didn't have any nightmares."

"That's great. You needed a good night's rest," Draco replied, relief that Harry had been able to sleep for once visibly showing on his face.

"Father I'm hungry," Emily suddenly said and looked up at Draco.

"I am too," Harry said agreeing with his daughter.

"All right I will get breakfast made but first I have to help Harry get ready," Draco said.

"No it's all right I can do it myself," Harry said quickly.

"Love I think I should help you-"

"No it's all right I can do it. I know my leg isn't much better but I can still do it," Harry stated.

"If you're sure you can get cleaned up? Do you need me to help you get dressed," Draco asked. He was still uncertain if Harry could do it all by himself.

"Yea I think so. But if I can't I will call you. I know that you put that weird button in the bathroom so I could get help if I need it," Harry said.

"That weird button is called an intercommy thing or something like that. It's a muggle way of talking in a house," Draco said off handedly.

"Okay, if I need help I will call you on that thing," Harry said as he started to work his way out of the bed and towards his wheelchair that was sitting next to the bed.

"If you're sure that you can do it all, then I will go and get breakfast started." Draco stood up and took Emily by the hand and ushering her out of the room and towards the kitchen.

Once Draco and Emily were gone Harry climbed into his wheelchair and began moving towards the bathroom. He really needed to use the loo soon or he would have an accident as he felt his bladder swell up and hurt a little.

Once he reached the bathroom he slowly stood up and dropped his boxers in front of the porcelain. Grabbing the railing that was on the back of it with both hands he let himself relieve his full bladder. Standing there he felt his damaged leg give out on him but luckily he was holding onto the bar and was able to keep himself from falling. He cursed a little as he hated when this happened.

His leg would always give out on him in the mornings and then later on in the day. He hated it because for some reason it made him feel weak. There was something in the back of his mind that told him that no one wanted him to be weak, that he was a famous person. Yes he knew what Draco had told him as well as various other people about his life. But that still didn't help him from trying to not avoid the issues or the knowledge that they told him.

It took him over an hour and half to finish up and be ready to work his way to the kitchen. Taking one last look at himself in the mirror, he turned the wheelchair around and headed out of his room.

The closer he got to the kitchen the more he felt hungry. He could smell the frying of bacon in the air as it wafted towards him. His stomach gave a lurch at this, telling him that he was indeed very hungry.

The three of them were sitting at the table enjoying their breakfast. Everyone was silent except for Emily who for some reason thought she had to entertain Harry with her antics. Every now and then Harry would laugh at either something she said or did. Draco would always scold her for it, but he would only get a smirk and a pout back from his daughter. He tried to be stern and stop her but he just couldn't do it and soon found himself laughing as well.

"I need to go make a call will quick. Are you two all right while I do," Draco asked as he stood up.

"Yes I think we'll be just fine," Harry replied.

"I'm okay father and Daddy's here anyway," Emily replied back at her father.

Assured that they were fine he walked out of the room and headed for the fireplace. He hoped that Hermione was home as he knew that she could be at work at the present time. But he assumed that she would be home as she still had a little girl at home.

Throwing a pinch of powder in the fireplace he called Weasley Den and waited for an answer. Soon he saw Hermione's bushy head popped into the fire.

"Draco what is it," she asked sounding concerned.

"Oh everything's fine. We had a little problem yesterday but now things are normal again," Draco drawled.

"Oh I know about yesterday," she said noncommittally.

Draco raised an eyebrow at that as he hadn't spoken to anyone about what happened. "And how do you know what happened," Draco asked a hint of annoyance in his voice.

"I stopped by looking for you guys. I hadn't seen any of you in awhile and wanted to see how things were going," she replied, her voice dropping a little.

"Oh and what did you see," Draco said in annoyance.

"Um, well I saw what was going on in Harry's room. Instead of saying I just left, thinking that you all needed time," Hermione said now embarrassed about having done what she did.

Draco was not a happy person at the moment. He had no plans of telling anyone what happened, at least not in detail. He didn't think Harry would want everyone to know and he for one didn't either.

"All right but please do not tell anyone. I do not want the entire world to know and you know very well that things have a way o making it to the papers," he admonished her.

"I know and I won't tell a soul. So what did you need," she asked quickly changing the subject.

"Well I was wondering if you possible go to Diagon Alley today and pick up a penseive for me."

"And why do you need one of them," she asked.

"Last night when I was getting ready for bed an idea struck me. I thought that I could put my memories of Harry and the various things he told me in it and then show him them. This way it would be easier for him to deal with his returning memories."

"That's a great idea Draco," She exclaimed. "After what I saw yesterday, you are probably right about it being easier to help him that way."

"I just wish that I had though of it sooner," he replied a little sadly.

"Hey don't you dare go feeling sorry for yourself," she admonished him. "No one thought about that and just allowed Harry to deal with them on his own or until he actually asked about them."

"You're right about that. So will you get one then," he asked sounding hopeful.

"Yes I will get one later today and bring it over," she said.

"I also thought maybe your and your husband could put some of your memories in it too. But I want both good and bad. If he's to finally start dealing with them in the way that he needs to he will need both," he said making sure that the bushy headed girl knew what he wanted.

"I think that's a great idea. I also agree that you need both. Do you want me to put them in it before I give it to you?"

"Yes I do. That way I can get started working with Harry on them."

"All right but Ron's working later tonight so I won't be able to bring it over until tomorrow."

"That's fine. He has a therapy session today and it wears him out. So we couldn't even get started until tomorrow," Draco explained.

"How are the sessions going," she asked.

"Not bad, he is getting a little better but I don't think he's going to much use back of his leg."

"I understand but we can always hope. If he doesn't hopefully he is able to use at least a cane or some other aid then that wheelchair. I just hate seeing him in that thing."

"Me too," Draco agreed. "I had better go. Thanks for getting that for me and I'll pay you back."

"Oh don't worry about that. It's the least we can do for Harry," Hermione said.

With that she disconnected the call by pulling her head out of the fire. Draco stood up and brushed himself off before heading for the kitchen.

He couldn't smile at the hope that he had about being able to finally give Harry what he needed in accepting his memories and life. He knew it would be a struggle for him to deal with many of the memories but he couldn't help feeling that he finally found a way to help his beloved.

**Well what did you guys think? I hope you will review and let me know. I would like to thank Lady-Serena-Snape for the idea of the penseive.**


	15. Chapter 15

**This is not a chapter and I will be removing it in a couple of days. I have been noticing that the reviews and the hits have all died on this. I also took the time and reread it only to find that being my first story it is lacking a lot. So what I'd like to know is if I shouldn't redo it and then repost it. Mind you I won't be able to do that for a couple of months. So please let me know what you think in a review.**


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